Piccadilly: A Fragment of Contemporary BiographyOliphant, Laurence
General
Piccadilly: A Fragment of Contemporary Biography
Oliphant, Laurence
Piccadilly (London, England) -- Fiction
Considering the extent to which I have been digressing, it will be
perhaps desirable, before I plunge again into the stormy current of my
narrative, to define in a few words what, in the language of diplomacy,
is termed "the situation." After I have done so, I shall feel much
obliged if you will kindly "grasp" it. Briefly, it is as follows: I am
telegraphed for in frantic terms by an old lady who is under the firm
impression that I am engaged to be married to her daughter. I am
violently in love with that daughter, but for certain reasons I have
felt it my duty to account for my extraordinary conduct by informing her
confidentially that I have occasional fits of temporary insanity. That
daughter, I am positively assured by her mother, is no less violently
attached to my most dear and intimate friend. My most dear and intimate
friend returns the affection. Mamma threatens that if I do not marry her
daughter, rather than allow my most dear and intimate friend to do so,
she will ally the young lady to an affluent native of Bombay. So much is
known. On the following points I am still in the dark:--
First, What on earth does Lady Broadhem mean by telling me to come
immediately, as delay may be fatal?--to whom? to me or to Lady Ursula,
or herself? My knowledge of her ladyship induces me to incline towards
the latter hypothesis; the suspense is, however, none the less trying.
Second, Does Lady Ursula imagine that I know how she and Grandon feel
towards each other?
Third, Is Grandon under the impression that I have actually proposed and
been accepted by Lady Ursula?
Fourth, Does my conduct occasionally amount to something more than
eccentricity or not?
Fifth--and this was very unpleasant--Shall I find Grandon at our joint
abode? And if so, what shall I say to him?
Sixth, Have Grandon and Lady Ursula met, and did anything pass between
them?
Thank goodness Grandon was at the House. So, after a hurried toilet, I
went on to Grosvenor Square. The young ladies were both out. Lady
Bridget had taken advantage of the _chaperonage_ of a newly-married
rather fast female cousin, to go to a ball. Lady Ursula had gone to a
solitary tea with a crabbed old aunt. Lady Broadhem was in her own
sitting-room, lying on a couch behind a table covered with papers. She
looked wearily up when I entered, and held out a thin hand for me to do
what I liked with. "How good of you to come, dear Frank!" she said. It
was the first time she had ever called me Frank, and I knew she expected
me to acknowledge it by pressing her fingers, so I squeezed them
affectionately. "Broadhem said if I wanted to make sure of you I ought
to have brought Ursula's name into the telegraph, but I told him her
mother's would do as well."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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