Produced by David Garcia, Mary Meehan and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net Plain Mary Smith A Romance of Red Saunders By Henry Wallace Phillips With Illustrations By Martin Justice New York The Century Co. 1905 Copyright, 1905, by THE CENTURY CO. Copyright, 1905, by FRANK LESLIE PUBLISHING HOUSE (Incorporated) _Published October, 1905_ THE DE VINNE PRESS [Illustration: "I grabbed cans of tomatoes, and pasted the heap"] CONTENTS I "BUT WASN'T IT A GORGEOUS SMASH!" II "THE VILLAGE PRIDE" III SANDY GRAY IV THE FIGHT V "ON MY BUREAU WAS A KNIFE--" VI "I'M MARY SMITH" VII "SAVE ME, ARTHUR!" VIII ARCHIE OUT OF ASPINWALL IX ENTER BROTHER BELKNAP X "YOUR LIFE, IF YOU HURT HIM!" XI SAXTON'S STORY XII BILL MEETS A RELATIVE XIII RED MAKES A FEW REMARKS XIV BROTHER BELKNAP'S REVOLUTION XV TOMATOES BY THE QUART XVI RED PLAYS TRUMPS LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS "I grabbed cans of tomatoes, and pasted the heap" "'You git married and shuck them clothes'" "'You fight that boy fair'" "I left home ... mother and father both waving me good-by in the road" "The _Matilda_ saw a whale, or something, and shied" "He grabbed up his wooden box and made a miracle" "'Still wearing your legs cut short, I see'" "I laid two strong hands on Archie's mane" "I crowded my victim down against the saddle with my left hand" PLAIN MARY SMITH A ROMANCE OF RED SAUNDERS I "BUT WASN'T IT A GORGEOUS SMASH!" Old Foster used to say the reason some women married men they entirely should not was because nature tried to even up all round. Very likely that's it, but it's a rocky scheme for the Little Results. When my mother married my father, it was the wonder of the neighborhood. I don't fully understand it to this day, as many things as I've seen. She was a beautiful, tall, kind, proud woman, who walked as if she owned the world and loved it; from her I get my French blood. Was there a dog got his foot run over? Here he comes for mother, hollering and whimpering, showing her the paw and telling her all about it, sure she'd understand. And she did. 'Twixt her and the brutes was some kind of sympathy that did away with need of words. Doggy'd look at her with eyebrows up and wigwag with his tail, "Left hind leg very painful. Fix it, but touch lightly, _if_ you please."