MÁSHA. I simply didn't know what to do from embarrassment. _They seat themselves on the sofa._ LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH _comes in._ SCENE X _The same and_ LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH LÍZA. Oh, good heavens, again! MÁSHA. This is terrible! RAZLYULYÁYEV. Ha, ha, ha! LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. Gurr, gurr, gurr; bul, bul, bul! With the finger nine! With the cucumber fifteen! How do, friend! [_Holds out his hand to_ KÓRSHUNOV] My respects! I haven't seen you for a thousand years and a day! How are you? KÓRSHUNOV. Oh, is this you, Lyubím? LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. [_Covering his face with his hands_] I'm not I, and the horse is not mine, and I'm not a coachman. KÓRSHUNOV. I remember you, brother! You used to roam the town and pick up kopeks. LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. You remember how I used to pick up kopeks, but do you remember how you and I used to go on sprees together? How we sat through the dark autumn nights, and how we skipped back and forth, from the tavern to the wine-shop? And don't you know who ruined me, and who turned me out with a beggar's wallet? KÓRSHUNOV. Why didn't you look out for yourself? Nobody dragged you in by the collar, my dear fellow. It's your own fault. LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. I was a fool! But, well, _you_ haven't much to be proud of! You raised me to such heights, you promoted me to such a place--I've stolen nothing, and yet I'm ashamed to look men in the eyes! KÓRSHUNOV. You're the same old joker as ever! [_Turning to_ LYUBÓV GORDÉYEVNA] You've got a jolly uncle! For old acquaintance sake, we'll surely have to give him a ruble. LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. Sh! It's not a question of rubles here! Pay up your old debts, and for my niece here a million three hundred thousand! I won't sell her cheaper. KÓRSHUNOV. [_Laughing_] Won't you come down? LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. Not a kopek! RAZLYULYÁYEV. Aha, Lyubím Kárpych! Don't you take any less! GORDÉY KÁRPYCH _comes in._ SCENE XI The same with GORDÉY KÁRPYCH GORDÉY KÁRPYCH. So you are here! What are you doing in my house? Clear out! KÓRSHUNOV. Wait a bit, Gordéy Kárpych; don't turn him out! Why turn him out? Let him show off and make jokes. He, he, he! LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. It's my brother that's joking, in giving his daughter to you, but I'll play such a joke on you as won't suit your stomach! GORDÉY KÁRPYCH. This isn't the place for him. Get out! LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. Wait, brother, don't turn me out! Do you think Lyubím Tortsóv has come to make jokes? Do you think Lyubím Tortsóv is drunk? I have come to you to ask riddles. [_To KÓRSHUNOV_] Why has an ass long ears? Now, then, give us an answer? RAZLYULYÁYEV. That's a hard one! KÓRSHUNOV. How do I know? LYUBÍM KÁRPYCH. So that all may know that he is an ass. [_To his brother_] Here's a riddle for you! To whom are you marrying your daughter? GORDÉY KÁRPYCH. That's not your affair! You've no business to ask me.