ERMYNTRUDE: O, mother, do you really think so? MRS. SLADDER: I'm sure of it, child. (_Looking out._) There! There he is! Walking along that path that they made. I can see he's got an idea. How like Napoleon.[*] He's walking with Mr. Splurge. They're coming in now. Come along, Ermyntrude, we mustn't disturb him to-day. He has some great idea, some great idea. [Footnote *: (N.B.--SLADDER _is not in the very least like Napoleon._)] ERMYNTRUDE: How splendid, mother! What do you think it is? MRS. SLADDER: Ah. I could never explain it to you, even if I knew. It is business, child, business. It isn't everybody that can understand business. ERMYNTRUDE: I hear them coming, mother. MRS. SLADDER: There must be things we can never understand: things too deep for us like. And business is the most wonderful of them all. [_Exeunt R._ [_Enter_ SLADDER _and_ SPLURGE _through the window, which opens on to the lawn, down a step or two._ SLADDER: Now, Splurge, we must do some business. SPLURGE: Yes, sir. SLADDER: Sit down, Splurge. SPLURGE: Thank you, sir. SLADDER: Splurge, I am going to say to you now, what I couldn't talk about with all those gardeners hanging about. And, by the way, Splurge, haven't we bought rather too many gardeners? SPLURGE: No, sir. The Earl of Etheldune has seven; we had to go one better than him, sir. SLADDER: Certainly, Splurge, certainly. SPLURGE: So I bought ten for you, sir, to be on the safe side. SLADDER: Ah, quite right, Splurge, quite right. There seemed to be rather a lot, but that's quite right. Well, now to business. SPLURGE: Yes, sir. SLADDER: I told you I'd invented a new name for a food. SPLURGE: Yes, sir. Cheezo. SLADDER: Well, what have you been able to do about it? SPLURGE: I've had some nice little posters done, sir. I'm having it well written up. I've got some samples here, and it looks like doing very well indeed. SLADDER: Ah! SPLURGE: It's a grand name, if I may say so, sir. It sounds so classical-like with that "O" at the end; and yet anyone can see what it's derived from, even if he's never learnt anything. It suggests cheese to them every time. SLADDER: Let's see your samples. SPLURGE: Well, sir, here's one. (_Brings paper from pocket. Reads._) "What is Cheezo? Go where you may, speak with whom you will, the same question confronts you. Cheezo is the great new----" SLADDER: No, Splurge. Cut that question bit. We must have no admission on our part that there's anyone who doesn't know what Cheezo is. Cut it. SPLURGE: You're quite right, sir; you're quite right. That's a weak bit. I'll cut it. (_He scratches it out. Reads._) "Cheezo is the great new food. It builds up body and brain." SLADDER: That's good. SPLURGE: "There is a hundred times more lactic fluid in an ounce of Cheezo than in a gallon of milk." SLADDER: What's lactic fluid, Splurge? SPLURGE: I don't know, sir, but it's good stuff all right. It's the right thing to have in it. It's a good man that I got to write this.