_Chr._ I shall convince you That you will do nothing of the sort. _Men._ Why not? _Chr._ You wouldn’t ask, If you only knew what a creature she is. _Men._ You know her? _Chr._ Ay. _Men._ But how? You never told me. _Chr._ She is spending the day at my house. ’Twas this I was coming to tell you about, but the other matter 980 Had driven it out of my head. I thought to discover for you (Seeing you did not know) what kind of person she was; That I might judge and tell you, whether you most were wrong In being at first so harsh to your son, or now to yourself. So I asked her to spend the day at my house. It has ended in this, That when I saw what kind of woman she really was, I offered her forty pounds if she would renounce your son. Believe me, she jumped at the bargain; so then, to prevent mistake, I made her sign a paper to that effect. I hold it. It cost me forty pounds; and that’s the money I said, That I had advanced for you. 991 _Men._ ’Twas very kind of you, Chremes. You see I am shocked. _Chr._ Nay, don’t give way. _Men._ You have dashed my hope. I was not prepared for this. Freeborn I knew she was not; But this I never suspected. _Chr._ Come to my house and see. I wish you to judge for yourself. _Men._ She is there? _Chr._ She is there, do you ask? Ay, to my cost she is there. No sooner she comes to the door, Than all is to be topsy-turvy. She calls me ‘old man!’ Asks if the bath is ready, and presently calls for wine. She’ll take a ‘whetting brusher,’ she says. The quantity She wasted in merely tasting was more than most men drink. 1000 She kept me an hour on my legs before she was pleased, and then Drank like a fish, & laughed at nothing & everything. Had it not been for you, Menedemus, I promise you I could not have stood it. _Men._ I feel extremely obliged to you, And sorry for this. You have been most friendly in all you have done. I cannot doubt you are right. But still whatever she is, I’d like to see her once. I can’t dine with you;—arrange To send her across to me. Explain to her who I am; And let me judge for myself if it is so impossible To carry out my former intention as you believe. _Chr._ By all means. I shall be glad enough to be rid of her. 1011 I go at once. _Men._ And find those Persians, whoever they are.