But I must now introduce a more important personage than even Lady
Hercules, which is my mother. They say "like master, like man," and I
may add, "like lady, like maid." Lady Hercules was fine, but her maid
was still finer. Most people when they write their biography, if their
parents were poor, inform you that they left them a good name and
nothing else. Some parents cannot even do that; but all parents can at
all events leave their children a _pretty_ name, by taking a little
trouble at their baptism. My mother's name was Araminta, which, as my
father truly observed, was "a touch above the common." She had
originally gone into service as a nursery maid, living in her first
situation one year and nine months; in her second she remained two years
and four months; then she left to _better_ herself, and obtained the
situation of nurse in a family where she remained two years and one
month; after which Lady Hercules then having a child of a year old, she
was received into her service. At three years old the child died, and my
mother was promoted to the situation of lady's maid. This advancement
quite spoiled her; she was prouder than her mistress, and gave herself
ten times more airs, and when, at first, my father (who as coxswain was
constantly up at the house) offered to speak to her, she turned away
from him in most ineffable disdain. Now my father was at that time about
thirty years of age, and thought no small beer of himself, as the saying
goes. He was a tall, handsome man, indeed, so good-looking that they
used to call him "Handsome Jack" on board of the "Druid," and he had,
moreover, a pigtail of most extraordinary size and length, of which he
was not a little proud, as it hung down far below the waistband of his
trousers. His hair was black and glossy, and his lovelocks, as the
sailors term the curls which they wear on their temples, were of the
most insinuating description. Now, as my father told me, when he first
saw my mother with her sky-scraping cap at the back of her head, so
different from the craft in general, he was very much inclined to board
her; but when she boomed him off in that style, my father, who was
quite the rage and fancy man among the ladies of Sally Port and Castle
Rag, hauled his wind in no time, hitching up his white trousers and
turning short round on his heel so as to present his back to her
whenever they happened to meet. For a long time he gave her a wide
berth. Now this fact of my father returning her disdain had the usual
effect. At first she was very savage, and when she spoke of him to Lady
Hercules, she designated him as "that proud coxswain, who seemed to
think himself a greater man than Sir Hercules himself--with his filthy
pigtail, indeed!" My father also, when he spoke of her to the boat's
crew, termed her "that proud ---- of a lady's maid," the word not
mentionable being both canine and feminine. Thus matters went on for
some time, until my mother, by a constant survey of my father's handsome
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