Portland, Oregon, A.D. 1999, and other sketches — John Shaqi
Portland, Oregon, A.D. 1999, and other sketchesHayes, J. W. (Jeff W.)
Science
Portland, Oregon, A.D. 1999, and other sketches
Hayes, J. W. (Jeff W.)
American fiction -- 20th century; Portland (Or.) -- Fiction; Short stories, American
Neppach received an order for a barrel which greatly pleased his
employer.
Two weeks passed by and Tony, who had been up the Valley on a business
trip, thought he would drop in at the Portland Ice Company before
reporting to his house.
Entering the machine room with a jaunty, nonchalant air, he began
singing in a high pitched voice, "How did you like my oil? How did you
like my oil?" this to the tune of "Where did you get that hat?"
The ice plant was in a complete state of chaos, pipes being torn out and
some 25 men were engaged in still further tearing out the piping. The
foreman was up on a high ladder assisting in the demolishing when he
espied Tony.
"There he is, there he is," he yelled and he slid down the ladder,
approaching the drummer with a formidable looking monkey wrench. His
language was strong, full of epithets and he swung the monkey wrench
menacingly.
Tony picked up a huge rock to defend himself, retreating backwards to
the door, where he beat his way to the store to ascertain the cause of
all this turbulent demonstration.
"Oh, that's so, you have been away and did not hear about it," said the
undisturbed Plummer. "You see, one of the boys made a mistake and sent
them the wrong oil, in fact, it was some oil which contained a good deal
of lard oil, and when they turned in the cold water into the pipes it
cooled off the lard and put them out of business."
The ice company lost that summer's output and litigation ensued, which
helped to popularize Dave Dunne's wares and Tony in disgust jumped his
job.
It was not long after this that Neppach was engaged by Nicolai Bros. as
manager of their planing mill and he was given full charge of the whole
business.
Nicolai Bros. owned some land down around Slabtown, a piece of which
they leased to a Swede, who ran a saloon on the premises.
The Swede's lease for three years was about to expire and as he was
doing a good business he became desirous to lease it for five years
longer. When he applied to the firm, he was referred to Mr. Neppach as
the proper person to negotiate with.
Tony saw him coming and determined to have a little fun.
Assuming a very severe air, he asked the Swede whose beer he sold, the
latter explaining that he had made a reputation with San Francisco beer.
"That settles it," exclaimed Tony, "you can't lease from us unless you
use the home product." Some important business at this juncture engaged
Neppach's attention, the Swede departed, and the incident was
temporarily forgotten.
A month later, the Swede called to pay his rent and announced that he
was now selling Weinhard's beer and was ready for the lease.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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