Post mortem: Essays, historical and medicalMacLaurin, C. (Charles)
History
Post mortem: Essays, historical and medical
MacLaurin, C. (Charles)
Biography; Pathology
However, the old war-horse in his retirement snuffed the battle and the
joyous smell of the burnings, and stoutly urged on the Inquisitors,
at whatever cost to his own quiet. Spain remained diligently Roman
Catholic at the orders of the Holy Roman Emperor and his son Philip;
and at this moment, when Charles was so urgently longing for peace and
retirement, English Mary, his cousin and daughter-in-law, in whose
interests he had loyally braved God, man, and Pope, lost Calais; the
French, under the Duke of Guise, took it from her. She might well
grieve and say the name would be found written on her heart; she but
echoed the feelings of her beloved Emperor. For weeks he mumbled with
toothless jaws the agony of his soul over this crowning misfortune, and
from this he never really recovered. Already how had the times changed
since the Spanish infantry had overrun Europe at his command!
But he could do nothing; he had abdicated. That iron hand was now so
crippled with gout that it could hardly even open an envelope, had to
sign its letters with a seal, and constantly held a tiny chafing-dish
to keep itself warm. Charles sat shivering and helpless, wrapped in a
great eiderdown cloak even in midsummer; his eyes fell on the portrait
of his beloved wife and of that plain Mary who had wished to marry
him, and on several favourite pictures by Titian. He listened to the
singing of the friars, and was resentful of the slightest wrong note,
for he had an exceedingly acute musical ear. The good fathers, in their
attempts to entertain him, brought famous preachers to preach to him;
he listened dutifully--he, whose lightest word had once shaken Europe,
but who now could hardly mumble in a slurring voice! And in spite of
the protests of Quixada he heroically sat down to eat himself to death.
It has been said that marriage for an old man is merely a pleasant way
of committing suicide; it is doubtful whether Charles enjoyed his
chosen method of self-poisoning, for he had lost the sense of taste,
and no food could be too richly seasoned for his tired palate. Vast
quantities of beef, mutton, venison, ham, and highly flavoured sausages
went past those toothless jaws, washed down by the richest wines, the
heaviest beers; the local hidalgoes quickly discovered that to reach
the Emperor’s heart all they had to do was to appeal to his stomach,
so they poured in upon him every kind of rich dainty, to the despair
of Quixada, who did his best to protect his master. “Really,” said he,
“kings seem to think that their stomachs are not made like other men’s!”
He sometimes used to go riding, but one day, when he was mounting his
pony, he was suddenly seized with an attack of giddiness so severe that
he nearly fell into the arms of Quixada, so that the Emperor, who had
once upon a time been the _beau ideal_ of a light cavalryman, had to
toil about heavily on foot in the woods, and to strive to hold his gun
steadily enough to shoot a wood-pigeon.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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