Short stories; United States -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction
A strange thing had happened to him. The sweet familiarity of each
detail in the _petite_ figure before him was impressing his mind as
never before, now that he had achieved his purpose of putting it beyond
the possibility of his own possession. The little hands he had held so
often in the old days, conning each curve and dimple, reckoning them
more his hands than were his own, and far more dearly so; the wavy hair
he had kissed so fondly and delighted to touch; the deep dark eyes under
their long lashes, like forest lakes seen through environing thickets,
eyes that he had found his home in through so long and happy a time,--
why, they were his! Of course he had never meant to really forfeit
them, to lose them, and let them go to anybody else. The idea was
preposterous,--was laughable. It was indeed the first time it had
occurred to him in that light. He had only thought of her as losing him;
scarcely at all of himself as losing her. During the whole time he
had been putting himself in her place so constantly that he had failed
sufficiently to fully canvass the situation from his own point of view.
Wholly absorbed in estranging her from him, he had done nothing to
estrange himself from her.
It was rather with astonishment and even an appreciation of the absurd,
than any serious apprehension, that he now suddenly saw how he had
stultified himself, and come near doing himself a fatal injury. For
knowing that her present estrangement was wholly his work, it did not
occur to him but that he could undo it as easily as he had done it. A
word would serve the purpose and make it all right again. Indeed, his
revulsion of feeling so altered the aspect of everything that he quite
forgot that any explanation at all was necessary, and, after gazing
at her for a few moments while his eyes, wet with a tenderness new and
deliciously sweet, roved fondly from her head to her little slipper,
doating on each feature, he just put out his arms to take her with some
old familiar phrase of love on his lips.
She sprang away, her eye flashing with anger.
He looked so much taken aback and discomfited that she paused in mere
wonder, as she was about to rush from the room.
“Annie, what does this mean?” he stammered. “Oh, yes,--why,--my
darling, don't you know,--did n't you guess,--it was all a joke,--
a stupid joke? I 've just been pretending.”
It was not a very lucid explanation, but she understood, though only to
be plunged in greater amazement.
“But what for?” she murmured.
“I did n't know I loved you,” he said slowly, as if recalling with
difficulty, and from a great distance, his motives, “and I thought it
was kind to cure you of your love for me by pretending to be a fool.
I think I must have been crazy, don't you?” and he smiled in a dazed,
deprecating way.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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