English poetry -- 19th century -- History and criticism; Pre-Raphaelitism in literature
Here we have a monologue. It is uttered to the poet by a young man with
whom he has been passing an hour in conversation. We can guess from
the story something about the young man; we can almost see him. We
know that he must be handsome, tall, graceful, and strong; and full of
that formidable coolness which the sense of great strength gives--great
strength of mind and will rather than of body, but probably both. Let
us hear him talk. "You see that friend of mine over there?" he says to
the poet. "He hates me now. When he looks at me his lips turn white. I
can't say that he is wrong to hate me, but really I wanted to do him a
service. He got fascinated by that woman of whom I was speaking; she
was playing with him as a cat plays with a mouse or with a bird before
killing it. Well, I thought to myself that my friend was in great
danger, and that it was better for me to try to save him. You see, he
is not the kind of man that a woman of that class could fancy; he is
too small, too feeble, too gentle; they like strong men only, men they
are afraid of. So, just for my friend's sake, I made love to her one
day, and she left him immediately and came to me. I have to take care
of her now, and I do not like the trouble at all. I never cared about
the woman herself; she is not the kind of woman that I admire; I did
all this only to save my friend. And my friend does not understand. He
thinks that I took the woman from him because I was in love with her;
he thinks it quite natural that I should love her (which I don't); but
he says that even in love a man ought to be true to his friends."
At this point of the story the young man sees that the poet is
disgusted by what he has heard, but this does not embarrass him; he
is too strong a character to be embarrassed at all, and he resumes:
"Don't be impatient--I want to tell you the whole thing. You see, I
have destroyed all the happiness of my friend merely through my desire
to do him a service. He hates me, and he does not understand. He thinks
that I was moved by lust; and everybody else thinks the same thing. Of
course it is not true. But now there is another trouble. The woman does
not understand. She thinks that I was really in love with her; and I
must get rid of her as soon as I can. If I tell her that I made love
to her only in order to save my friend, she will say, 'What had that
to do with your treatment of me? I did not do you any harm; why should
you have amused yourself by trying to injure and to deceive me?' If she
says that, I don't know how I shall be able to answer. So it seems that
I have made a serious mistake; I have lost my friend, I have wantonly
wronged a woman whose only fault toward me was to love me, and I have
made for myself a bad reputation in society. People cannot understand
the truth of the thing."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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