Priscilla and Charybdis: A Story of AlternativesMoore, Frank Frankfort
General
Priscilla and Charybdis: A Story of Alternatives
Moore, Frank Frankfort
Fiction
“Our friend has thrown us down a challenge, and we’re only too glad to
take it up,” he cried. “Has either of us ever done a real day’s work? he
asks. Well, here’s my wife’s answer. Here we are in this hall to-night.
Now, to-morrow morning at 10 o’clock my wife will show all who honour
her with a visit in this place whether anyone in this neighbourhood can
tell her something she doesn’t know in dairy work. She’ll do a day’s
butter making with her own hands, and you’ll be able to judge for
yourselves whether or not I have been over or under the mark in my claim
that we understand what we’re talking about. If my speeches here haven’t
contained much butter it’s not because we don’t know what the real thing
is or that one of us at least can’t make it with it the best in the
land. There’s no duchess in this country or any other that can beat Mrs.
Wingfield at butter making (laughter), but it’s not for me to talk to
you of it; you come here, any of you that know what butter is, and you
can judge for yourselves to-morrow and maybe the day after. One friend
up there talked of a single day’s real work. Well, we accept his
challenge and double the task--two days--three--four--if he insists.
Now, mind you, this is no joke. You’ll find that it’s no joke if any of
you hope to beat the butter that will be made here to-morrow and as much
longer as you please.”
He sat down “amid a scene of indescribable enthusiasm,” as the local
newspapers had it, only they said that “he resumed his seat.” The
man who had asked that question from the gallery was the driver of a
traction engine, and he had long been suspected of harbouring unworthy
socialistic theories. He thought it prudent to leave the hall before the
close of the meeting.
“How will you get out of it?” asked Mr. Forrester of Priscilla. “That
husband of yours has either made himself or marred himself by his
attempt to get the better of that man in the gallery. How does he mean
you to get out of the business?”
“He doesn’t,” replied Priscilla. “It was I who told him to take up the
challenge. Oh, Mr. Forrester, we’re all sick to death of this vulgar
talk, talk, talk day after day and night after night. Thank goodness
that I have now a chance of turning from that unwholesome stuff to a
good clean worthy job of butter making. I’ll win this election for my
husband in the legitimate way of work as opposed to words.”
And she did win it for him.
By eleven o’clock the next morning she had turned the hall into a dairy,
and in the daintiest dairymaid’s costume that had ever been seen, with
her white arms bare to the elbow, she churned her milk and turned out
pat after pat of the finest butter that had ever been seen in that
neighbourhood. By the evening she had produced sufficient to stock a
shop for a day, and she had leisure to make all the farmers’ daughters
acquainted with the scientific tests by whose aid alone could the best
results be obtained.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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