PROBLEM IN SOLID
BY GEORGE O. SMITH
Illustrated by Orban
[Transcriber's Note: This etext was produced from
Astounding Science-Fiction, October 1947.
Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that
the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.]
Martin Hammer should have been prepared for anything. As the world's
foremost producer of motion pictures, he should have taken any
situation from earthquake to fatherhood without a qualm or a turned
eyebrow. But Hammer had not seen everything--yet.
A noise presented itself at Hammer's office door. Not the noise of
knocking or tapping, nor even the racket made by attempts to breach
the portal with a heavy blunt instrument. It was more like the sound
of a dentist's drill working on wood, or perhaps one of those light
burring tools, or maybe even a light scroll saw.
Then, with all the assurance in the world, a man's hand came through
the door, the fingers clenched about an imaginary doorknob. The hand
swung an imaginary door aside and as it moved, the wood of the real
door fell to the floor in a pile of finely-ground sawdust.
Once the imaginary door was thrust aside, the rest of the intruder
entered, leaving the exact outline of his silhouette in the door.
He smiled affably and said, "I trust I'm not intruding!"
He was still holding the imaginary door open with his right hand. As
he finished speaking, he stepped forward a step, turned, pulled the
imaginary door shut a few inches, transferred it to take the inside
knob in his left hand, and then stepping carefully forward, he thrust
the imaginary door closed, his hand clenched around the imaginary knob.
The act ended as his hand entered the real doorknob and there was the
high-pitch whine of metal against metal like cutting a tin can with a
bandsaw.
The intruder turned, walked across the office, and stood there in front
of Martin Hammer. From a pocket he look a cigarette and a match and lit
up, blowing a cloud of fragrant smoke into the air.
"I am delighted to meet you," he said.
At which point, Martin Hammer blew up.
He had been patient. He had been astounded. He had been sitting there
with his chin getting lower and lower and lower as this ... this
character walked through his door with all the assurance in the world.
Then the bird had the affrontery to behave as though he had not invaded
Hammer's office; had not ruined a fine oak door; and as though Hammer
should have been glad to see him.
What added fuel to Hammer's explosion was the fact that the intruder
seemed absolutely unaware of the ruination of the door.
"What the--" yelled Hammer. He leaped to his feet, ran around his desk,
and faced the intruder angrily for only an instant.
Hammer launched himself at the intruder with intent to do bodily harm,
mayhem, and perhaps a little bit of second-degree murder that might be
juried into justifiable homicide.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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