Problematic Characters: A NovelSpielhagen, Friedrich
General
Problematic Characters: A Novel
Spielhagen, Friedrich
Fiction
him, and cared to be loved by him, was dazzling and confusing him; and
at last all the passionate tenderness of his soul had broken forth, the
long pent-up current of affection had overflowed its banks--powerfully,
irresistibly, like a mountain torrent which breaks through a rocky gate
and pours its waters exultingly into the broad valley.
"Do you know," said the boy to Oswald, "that I was determined
beforehand to hate you?"
"Why, Bruno, is hatred so sweet?"
"Oh, no. But I thought all tutors were like our first, and so I said to
myself that what was good for one was good for all."
"And how was Mr. Bauer?"
"Well, he was a boor," said the boy, bitterly.
"Why, my proud little lord, will you despise all low-born men?"
"Certainly not," exclaimed the boy, warmly; "my own father was but a
peasant, although he was a nobleman; I have often seen him behind the
plough; but this man was coarse and rude, and a coward into the
bargain. Once after dinner, I do not know what I had done, he slapped
me in the face because aunty was present, and he thought she would be
pleased to see him do so. Yes, he beat me," and the boy's eye flashed
as he recalled the insult, and the big vein on his forehead, where
wrath lies hidden, swelled up high.
"And then, Bruno?"
"Then I took the knife that was lying before me on the table and jumped
at him, and the wretch ran away, crying for help. And when I saw that,
and all the pale faces around me, I could not help laughing, and went
quietly out of the room. And I would have liked to run away into the
wide, wide world on the spot, but uncle came after me and promised me
that that man should never touch me again. Uncle is very kind; you
don't know how kind he is. But he is afraid of aunty; everybody is
afraid of her--and yet I am fond of her, for she has pluck like a man,
and I hate only cowards. Malte is a coward."
"Malte is weak and sickly, and you ought to be patient with him; but if
you are really fond of your aunt, why are you so cross to her?"
"Am I cross?" The boy became silent. A cloud passed over his brow, his
nostrils quivered, and his dark-blue eyes looked like a thunder-cloud
when he said, glancing quickly upward:
"I know I am cross; but how can I help that? I am only on sufferance
here in the house; shall I be grateful for that? I cannot be so; I will
not be so, and if they were to turn me out. Look here, Oswald, I have
often wished they would drive me away; I have done things on purpose to
make them send me off; then I would go into the wide world and earn my
own bread, as thousands of boys do who are not half as strong and as
brave as I am. Even to-day, as we were walking along the strand, and
the great three-decker rose on the horizon and disappeared again, I
wished, oh! so eagerly, I could have sailed away in her as a boy, as a
sailor--only away, away from here, no matter where to."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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