Association of ideas; Memory; Paragrammatism; Psychoanalysis; Psychology, Pathological; Repression (Psychology)
“The stethoscope association was formed through many connections.
In the first place, the physical appearance of the instrument--a
straight, rigid, hollow tube, having a small bulbous summit at one
extremity and a broad base at the other--and the fact of its being
the essential part of the medical paraphernalia, the instrument with
which the doctor performed his magical and interesting feats, were
matters that attracted his boyish attention. He had had his chest
repeatedly examined by the doctor at the age of six, and distinctly
recollected the voluptuous sensation of feeling the latter’s head
near him pressing the wooden stethoscope into his chest, and of the
rhythmic to-and-fro respiratory movement. He had been struck by the
doctor’s habit of carrying his stethoscope inside his hat; he found it
interesting that the doctor should carry his chief instrument concealed
about his person, always handy when he went to see patients, and that
he only had to take off his hat (_i.e_., a part of his clothing) and
‘pull it out.’ At the age of eight he was impressed by being told by
an older boy that it was the doctor’s custom to get into bed with
his women patients. It is certain that the doctor, who was young and
handsome, was extremely popular among the women of the neighbourhood,
including the subject’s own mother. The doctor and his ‘instrument’
were therefore the objects of great interest throughout his boyhood.
“It is probable that, as in many other cases, unconscious
identification with the family doctor had been a main motive in
determining the subject’s choice of profession. It was here doubly
conditioned (1) by the superiority of the doctor on certain interesting
occasions to the father, of whom the subject was very jealous, and (2)
by the doctor’s knowledge of forbidden topics[56] and his opportunity
for illicit indulgence. The subject admitted that he had on several
occasions experienced erotic temptations in regard to his women
patients; he had twice fallen in love with one, and finally had married
one.
“The next memory was of a dream, plainly of a homosexual-masochistic
nature; in it a man, who proved to be a replacement figure of the
family doctor, attacked the subject with a ‘sword.’ The idea of a
sword, as is so frequently the case in dreams, represented the same
idea that was mentioned above to be associated with that of a wooden
stethoscope. The thought of a sword reminded the subject of the passage
in the _Nibelung Saga_, where Sigurd sleeps with his naked sword
(_Gram_) between him and Brunhilda, an incident that had always greatly
struck his imagination.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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