Produced by Malcolm Farmer, Lesley Halamek, and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net (This book was created from images of public domain material made available by the University of Toronto Libraries (http://link.library.utoronto.ca/booksonline/).) * * * * * Punch, or the London Charivari Volume 105, December 2, 1893. _edited by Sir Francis Burnand_ * * * * * TO A LADY. (_Whose "Fringe" has fallen off at a Ball._) Alas! those waving curls, That parting on your brow, Had been some other girl's! "Vhere ish dot barting now?" Like BREITMANN'S barty gone Avay in _ewigkeit_, Those curls which you put on To grace the ball to-night. Too feeble were the pins, Too frisky were your hops; Derisive are the grins, Departing parting drops. A parting, this, that shocks Beholders evermore; You dare not claim those locks Now lying on the floor. I used to think them fair, I find them false instead; If thus you lose your hair, I shall not lose my head. Nor certainly my heart-- With that I should not care So readily to part As you with purchased hair. We kick those curls aside. Your looks and locks have fled, Then hasten home to hide Your much diminished head. * * * * * DON PEDRO D'ALCANTARA LE COMTE D'EU is eighteen. He is pursuing his studies at a Military Academy, speaks German fairly well, and in his leisure hours is, we are informed, "studying Polish." The latter being acquired, he will become a most polish'd Prince. He is so very well off that he will not have to go to Brazil for a crown. * * * * * [Illustration: DOMESTIC THRIFT. SCENE--_Entrance-hall at the Browns, after one of their Parties._ _Jones_ (_the last to depart, as usual_). "WHAT A DELICIOUS DRINK, WAITER! WHAT _IS_ IT!" _Waiter._ "THE LEAVINGS, SIR!"] * * * * * PRINCE ALEXANDER OF BATTENBERG. Europe's Prince Charming, lion-like, born to dare, Betrayed by the black treacherous Northern Bear! Soldier successful vainly, patriot foiled, Wooer discomfited, and hero spoiled! Triumphant champion of Slivnitza's field, To sordid treachery yet doomed to yield; Of gallant heart and high-enduring strain, Valiant resultlessly, victor in vain! Motley career of mingled shine and shame, Material fashioned for romantic fame! An age more chivalrous you should have seen, When brutal brokers, and when bagmen keen, Shamed not the sword and blunted not the lance. Then had you been true Hero of Romance. Now, when to Mammon Mars must bow his crest, King-errantry seems a Quixotic quest, And "unfulfilled renown" finds only--early rest! * * * * * A VALETUDINARIAN'S VISDOM.