Happily I have now found out what to do when this occurs. Enderby and Jackson believe that the next train is the 10.15; but that is their narrow-minded parochialism. They are quite wrong. About ten minutes after the 8.52 has gone away another perfectly good train steals panting from the undergrowth. When one has missed the 8.52 one cannot wait on the platform till 10.15, nor, on the other hand, having waved an airy good morning to the butcher, the baker and the grocer as I trotted along, can I very well go back and undo it. And then the derision at home, the half-drunk stirrup-cup of coffee standing tepid and forlorn. But, as I say, the 9.5 is a perfectly sound train. It is quite true that it goes to Brighton, but the weather has been very warm of late. I hate these splits in the local Hunt, but there it is. EVOE. * * * * * Illustration: "THE RESOURCES OF CIVILISATION." MR. LLOYD GEORGE. "STICK TO IT, BONAR. POOR OLD SISYPHUS NEVER HAD AN IMPLEMENT LIKE THIS." * * * * * Illustration: HIGH LIFE ON THE UNDERGROUND. _Lady (to tiresome individual)._ "I'VE ALREADY TOLD YOU--HAMMERSMITH IS THE NEXT BUT ONE. THE NEXT IS BARON'S COURT. THAT'S MY STATION, NOT YOURS." _The Individual._ "AHEM! THE BARONESS, I PRESOOM?" * * * * * THE DINING GLADIATOR; OR, WAR TO THE KNIFE (AND FORK). (_Being further Extracts from a certain Diary_). _August 4th, 1914._--Declaration of War. I hereby take a solemn oath not to relax my efforts to win this struggle for England, even if it costs me my last drop of ink. Began my series of powerful articles by calling for KITCHENER, of whom I now, if guardedly, approve. Lunched at the Carlton and dined at the Ritz to let all the world see that I am not downhearted. * * * Spent the morning at the War Office, showing everyone how the work there ought to be done. Then to Downing Street to put things right there. Lunched at Claridge's with six Leading Ladies, all of them cheery souls. * * * Week-ended at Melton. Some good tennis and bridge. Fear that none of our generals really knows his job. * * * I have been wondering to-day if any other military journalist could possibly know such a lot of the Smart Set, and so intimately as I do. I am extraordinary lucky in having all these nice people to fall back on when I am worn out with War-winning and Tribunal duties. * * *