_Charles._ She didn't seem to be equally complimentary to _you_, Uncle. "A Russian spy," wasn't it? But really, you know, you might have come to me for any information you require. _I_ don't mind telling you all there is to tell. And surely Aunt knows I've been to a music-hall; why, she pitched into me about it enough last Sunday! _Mr. Toov._ I--I think she wanted to know whether you went frequently, CHARLES, or only that once. _Charles._ Oh, and so she sent you up to pump my landlady? Well, I'll tell you exactly how it is. I don't set up to be a model young man like your friend CURPHEW. I don't spend all my evenings in this cheerful and luxurious apartment. Now and then I find the splendour of the surroundings rather too much for me, and I'm ready to go anywhere, even to a music-hall, for a change. There, I blush to say, I spend an hour or two, smoking cigars, and even drinking a whisky and soda, or a lemon squash, listening to middle-aged ladies in sun-bonnets and accordion skirts singing out of tune. I don't know that they amuse me much, but, at all events, they're livelier than Mrs. CAGNEY. I'm dining out to-night, at the Criterion, with a man at the office, and it's as likely as not we shall go in to the Valhalla or the Eldorado afterwards. There, you can't say I'm concealing anything from you. And I don't see why you should groan like that, Uncle. _Mr. Toov._ (_feebly_). I--I'd rather you didn't go to the--the Eldorado, CHARLES. _Charles._ There's ingratitude! I thought you'd be touched by my devotion. _Mr. Toov._ (_to himself_). I _can't_ tell him I was thinking of going there myself! (_Aloud._) You will show your devotion best by keeping away. The less young men go to such places, my boy, the better! _Charles._ Not for _you_, Uncle. You forget that it's the humble five bob of fellows like me that help to provide your next dividend. _Mr. Toov._ (_wincing_). Don't, CHARLES, it--it's ungenerous and undutiful to reproach me with being a shareholder when you know how innocently I became one! _Charles._ But I _wasn't_ reproaching you, Uncle, it was rather the other way round, wasn't it? And really, considering you _are_ a shareholder in the Eldorado, it's a little too strong to condemn me for merely going there. _Mr. Toov._ I--I may not be a shareholder long, CHARLES. Unless I can conscientiously feel able to retain my shares I shall take the first opportunity of selling them. _Charles._ But why, Uncle? Better stick to them now you have got them! _Mr. Toov._ What? with the knowledge that I was profiting by practices I disapproved of? Never, CHARLES! _Charles._ But you can't _sell_ without making a profit, you know; they've gone up tremendously. _Mr. Toov._ Oh, dear me! Then, do you mean that I shouldn't even be morally justified in selling them? Oh, you don't think _that_, CHARLES?