Punch or the London Charivari, September 9, 1914Various
History
Punch or the London Charivari, September 9, 1914
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
And yonder where the battle's waves
Broke yesterday o'erhead,
Where now the swift and shallow graves
Cover our English dead,
Think how your sisters play their part,
Who serve as in a holy shrine,
Tender of hand and brave of heart,
Under the Red Cross sign.
Ah, by that symbol, worshipped still,
Of life-blood sacrificed,
That lonely Cross on Calvary's hill
Red with the wounds of CHRIST;
By that free gift to none denied,
Let Pity pierce you like a sword,
And Love go out to open wide
The gate of life restored.
O.S.
The Red Cross Society is in need of help. Gifts should be addressed to
Lord Rothschild at Devonshire House, Piccadilly.
* * * * *
A BRUSH WITH THE ENEMY.
"I think we may advance to attack," said the Prussian Commander, folding
up the _Berliner Tageblatt_ War Map.
"One moment, Sir," interposed the Chief of Staff, "the supply of
captured alien women and children is exhausted."
"Then," said the Commander, "we shall be forced to confront the enemy's
fire without the usual screen."
"Why not advance under a flag of truce?" suggested the Chief of Staff.
"I am loth to violate the canons of civilized warfare," said the
Commander, "but really there seems no other way, unless--unless----
Here! Hand me a telegram form. I have an idea."
The Commander wrote rapidly for a minute. "Send this at once," he said,
"and pre-pay the reply."
In an hour the answer arrived. The Commander tore it open with eager
haste. "We are saved!" he cried. "The advance commences at daybreak
to-morrow." He tossed the telegram over to the Chief of Staff, who
read:--"Am forwarding immediately per special train 1,000 foxes as
requested.--Hagenbeck, Hamburg."
And the KAISER, reading the Commander's despatch later in the day,
mailed his Super-strategist the insignia of the Order of the
Double-faced Vulture.
* * * * *
DIARY OF A KAISER.
_Sunday._--To-day has witnessed another triumph for the high-souled
German army. Ten Belgian villages have been burnt. Some of the
inhabitants have been also burnt; the rest have been driven out to
starve. This will teach Belgium not to build villages in the way of a
possible German advance. General von Schweinehund was in command of the
noble German column. Have telegraphed my supreme congratulations and
have conferred upon him the Iron Cross. How splendidly God is behaving
in these days.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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