Punch, or the London Charivari, The Christmas Number, 1890Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, The Christmas Number, 1890
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
"It looks very like it," said _Mr. P._; "but it's not at all the sort
of thing that would be permitted in our House of Commons. We make
Rules, and the Speaker sees that they are obeyed in the spirit, as
well as in the letter."
By the time questions were over, following on the prelude of private
business, the evening was getting on. Members evidently tired out; had
crowded in to vote on the Pump-handle question; sat in serried rows
during the squabbles of question-time; and as soon as business was
actually reached, House swiftly emptied, leaving about a score of
Members. TIME more than ever distracted. _Mr. P._ increasingly perky.
"Ho! ho!" he said, rubbing his hands, "I don't wonder at this Star
going to the Dogs. Stop till you come over to Westminster, TIME, dear
boy, and we'll show you how public business should be carried on."
[Illustration]
Explain to them that House is now in Committee on a Bill that had at
earlier stages occupied some months of the Session, practically the
greater portion of its working time. Now Session drawing to a close;
agreed on both sides that it is too late to conclude Bill this
Session; will be dropped after another night or two; Members knowing
this, do not think it worth while to give up more time to Bill. Next
Session it will be brought in again, and if the Government have better
luck, and get earlier stages through in less time, there will be a
chance of it passing.
"What!" shrieked TIME, forgetting where he was, "you don't mean to say
that after devoting nearly a whole Session to a measure, laboriously
shaping it up to a certain stage, you chuck away all your work because
the Almanack says it's August? Why don't you, when you meet again
in February, take the Bill up at the stage you dropped it? Why don't
you--"
Here our friend's observations were brought to a sudden close. TIME
was, as _Mr. P._ subsequently remarked, reduced to the status of
a half-Timer. Angry cries of "Order! Order!" broke in on his
unpremeditated speech. Two attendants, approaching him on either
flank, seized him, and led him forth under the personal direction of
the Sergeant-at-Arms. _Mr. P._, following his friend, and endeavouring
from the top of the staircase to assure him that, "we manage these
things better at Westminster," was promptly taken into custody, and
led forth beyond the precincts, a combination of circumstances that
interrupted and, indeed, as far as my friends were concerned, finally
closed what was beginning to promise to prove an agreeable and
instructive evening.
_Business Done_.--_Mr. Punch_ and another Stranger expelled from the
Gallery, and TOBY's narrative completed.
* * * * *
VISIT TO VENUS.
[Illustration]
The two Travellers made their way through space in silence, but on a
sudden Father TIME plucked his conductor by the sleeve, and spoke.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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