E-text prepared by Matt Whittaker, Juliet Sutherland, and the Project Gutenberg Online Distributed Proofreading Team (https://www.pgdp.net) Note: Project Gutenberg also has an HTML version of this file which includes the original illustrations. See 22691-h.htm or 22691-h.zip: (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/2/6/9/22691/22691-h/22691-h.htm) or (https://www.gutenberg.org/dirs/2/2/6/9/22691/22691-h.zip) PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI VOL. 104 MARCH 11, 1893. MIXED NOTIONS. No. VI.--REGISTRATION REFORM. (_Scene and Persons as Usual._) _First Well-Informed Man_ (_bristling with indignation, as he lays down his newspaper_). Well, I'm dashed! _Inquirer_ (_nervously_). What's up? _First W. I. M._ _What's up!_ Everything's up. Up the spout, that's where this blessed country will be if this kind of thing's going on. _Inquirer._ What kind of thing? _First W. I. M._ Why, all this gerrymandering kind of business. _Inquirer._ Oh, by the way, that reminds me. I came on that word the other day. Can any of you chaps tell me what it means? _First W. I. M._ It's as plain as a pikestaff. It means playing ducks and drakes with things all round, and letting the whole business go thoroughly rotten. _Inquirer._ Has it got anything to do with jerry-builders? _First W. I. M._ It's the same thing precisely. _Inquirer_ (_insisting_). But what's the point of calling 'em jerry? Where does that come in? _First W. I. M._ It's a French word. _Second W. I. M._ It isn't. It's German. _First W. I. M._ Bosh, it's French. _Second W. I. M._ I bet you a dollar it's German. _First W. I. M._ And I bet you a dollar it's French. (_To Average Man._) Here, you decide. Which is it? _Average Man._ Well, I'm sure it isn't French---- _Second W. I. M._ (_interrupting_). Of course it isn't. Pay up, my boy! _Average Man_ (_continuing_). But, on the other hand, it isn't German. _First W. I. M._ Oh, rot! It must be one or the other, you know. (_Scornfully._) You'll be telling us it's Greek next. _Average Man._ Well, of course, it _might_ be; but, as a matter of fact, I fancy it's English. _First W. I. M._, _Second W. I. M._ (_together_). Oh, you tell that to the Marines! It won't wash here. _Inquirer_ (_doubtfully_). Perhaps it's American. _Average Man_ (_resignedly_). Well I daresay it is. Any way, you can have it so if you like, It may be Sanskrit for all I care. [_Retires to his paper. A pause._ _Inquirer_ (_to First W. I. M._). But, look here, what made you lose your hair, just now? You looked as angry as blazes about something.