Punch or the London Charivari, Vol. 104, May 27, 1893Various
General
Punch or the London Charivari, Vol. 104, May 27, 1893
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Wednesday._--Pretty to see GORST just now balancing MACARTNEY'S hat
by brim on tip of his nose. Looks easy enough when done by an
expert; those inclined to scoff at the accomplishment should try it
themselves. Opportunity came suddenly, and unexpectedly. No ground for
supposing GORST had been practising the trick in the Cloak-room before
entering House. No collusion; all fair and above-board--or, rather,
above nose. Came about as incident in Committee on Home-Rule Bill.
JOKIM, taking part in game of Chairman-baiting, challenged MELLOR'S
ruling on putting Motion to Report Progress. House being cleared for a
Division, rules of debate require Member to address Chair seated, and
wearing his hat. What would happen to British Constitution if, in
such circumstances, Member rose and addressed SPEAKER or Chairman in
ordinary fashion, Heaven only knows. No mere man bold enough to try
it. Even Mr. G., who has Disestablished a Church, and now tampers with
Unity of the Empire, shrinks before this temptation.
JOKIM, making his complaint, got along all right. Performed task
in due form; MELLOR justified his action; GORST proposed to follow.
Hadn't got his hat with him; but that of no consequence, since JOKIM
was at hand. "Lend me one of your hats," he whispered hurriedly to his
Right Hon. Friend.
"What do you mean?" said JOKIM. "I've only one."
"Oh!" said GORST, raising his eyebrows with polite incredulity.
MACARTNEY, sitting behind, proffered his. GORST planted it on his
head; found it three sizes too small; still, if he held on to it,
he might manage. "Mr. MELLOR," he commenced, but got no further
with projected speech. Attention of House drawn to him his dilemma
discovered: shout of laughter burst forth as hat gradually tilted
forward, and GORST, deftly catching it by brim on tip of his nose,
balanced it for fifteen seconds by Westminster Clock. Chairman seized
opportunity of abstracted attention to put question, and when GORST,
recapturing MACARTNEY'S hat, had fixed it again on summit of his head,
division was called; too late for him to speak.
_Business done._--Second Clause Home Rule Bill added.
[Illustration: Mr. G.'s "Table-Talk."]
_Friday._--Treasury Chest Bill on for Third Reading. Has since
introduction wrought singular effect upon HANBURY. Nobody knows what
Bill is about, least of all HANBURY; but he has opposed it at every
stage. Yesterday divided Committee on First Clause; returns to attack
to-day. "Better let us get away for our hardly-earned holiday," I
said.
"That's very well for you, TOBY," said HANBURY, beating his chest
in default of getting at the Treasury's; "but there's a dark mystery
under this business which I mean to fathom. You remember the case of
another chest and its weird associations?
'Fifteen men on a dead man's chest--
Ho! Ho! Ho! and a bottle of rum.'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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