Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, September 16th, 1893Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 105, September 16th, 1893
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
SCENE III.--_The Study._ Mr. TOOVEY and CHARLES _are alone together_.
Mr. TOOVEY _has found it impossible to come to the point_.
_Charles (looking at his watch)._ I say, Uncle, I'm afraid I must
trouble you for that wigging at once, if I'm going to catch my train
back. You've only seven-and-a-half minutes left to exhort me in, so
make the most of it.
_Mr. T. (with embarrassment)._ Yes, CHARLES, but--I don't wish to be
hard on you, my boy--we are all liable to err, and--and, in point of
fact, the reason I was a little upset at the mention of the Eldorado
is, that a very dear old friend of mine, CHARLES, has lately lost a
considerable sum through investing in a Company of the same name--and,
just for the moment, it struck me that it might have been the
music-hall--which of course is absurd, eh?
_Charles._ Rather! He couldn't possibly have lost it in the
_music-hall_, Uncle; it's ridiculous!
_Mr. T. (relieved)._ Just what I thought. A man in
his--ah--responsible position--oh no. But he's lost it in this other
Company. And they've demanded a hundred and seventy-five pounds over
and above the five hundred he paid on his shares. Now _you_ know the
law. Can they _do_ that, CHARLES? Is he legally liable to pay?
_Charles._ Couldn't possibly say without knowing all the facts. It's a
Limited Company, I suppose?
_Mr. T._ I--I don't know, CHARLES, but I can show you the official
document which--ah--happens to be in my hands. I'm afraid I didn't
examine it very carefully--I was too upset. (_He goes to his
secretaire, and returns with a paper, which he offers for_ CHARLES'S
_inspection_.) You won't mind my covering up the name? My--my friend
wouldn't care for it to be seen--I'm sure.
_Charles (glances at the top of the paper, and roars with laughter)._
I say, Uncle, your friend _must_ be a jolly old juggins!
_Mr. T. (miserably)._ I don't think he could be described as _jolly_
just now, CHARLES.
_Charles._ No, but I mean, not all there, you know--trifle weak in the
upper story.
_Mr. T. (with dignity)._ He never professed to be a man of business,
CHARLES, any more than myself, and his inexperience was shamefully
abused--_most_ shamefully!
_Charles._ Abused! But look here, Uncle, do you mean to say you don't
see that this is a dividend warrant!
_Mr. T._ I believe that is what they call it. And--and is he bound to
send them a cheque for it at once, CHARLES?
_Charles._ Send them a cheque? Great SCOTT! Why it _is_ a cheque!
They're paying _him_. It's the half-yearly dividend on his five
hundred, at the rate of seventy per cent. And he was going to----Oh,
Lord!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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