Take a lot of black triangles, Some amorphous blobs of red; Just a sprinkle of queer spangles, An ill-drawn Medusa head; Some red locks in Gorgon tangles, And a scarlet sunshade, spread: Take a "_portière_" quaint and spotty, Take a turn-up nose or two; The loose lips of one "gone dotty," A cheese-cutter chin, askew; Pose like that of front-row "TOTTIE," Hat as worn by "COSTER LOO"; Take an hour-glass waist, in section, Shoulders hunched up camel-wise; Give a look of introspection (Or a squint) to two black eyes; Or a glance of quaint dejection, Or a glare of wild surprise; Slab and slop them all together With a background of sheer sludge; (Like a slum in foggy weather), And this blend of scrawl and smudge Vend as ART--in highest feather!-- Dupes in praise will blare and blether. Honest _Burchells_ will cry--"FUDGE!!!" * * * * * A Demi-French Octave. (_Picked up in a Dressing-room._) My razor, you're a true _raseur_, That is, you bore me badly! You're blunt, you gash--_de tout mon coeur_ I _bless_ you wildly, madly! _Vraiment, c'est vous qu' j'ai en horreur_ Each morn on rising sadly; Were't not that shaving's _de rigueur_, In turn I'd cut _you_ gladly! * * * IN VIEW OF HOLIDAYS. A HINT.--Of course if you're on pedestrian tours bent--if you're a bicyclist you'll be still more bent--you cannot do better than, as a pedestrian, get WALKER'S Maps. If you are going to sail, or by steam, you are again referred to----"WALKER, London." There is a good idea in these Maps which might be still further developed, and that is not only to show the route and the manner of making your journey, but by arrangement with the principal Steam-boat and Railway Companies some sort of "itinerary" might be added to the Map, with information as to the "means whereby," which to the toiler in search of a brief holiday "by rail, by river, or by sea," and perhaps by all three, would be most useful were it available as an almost "instantaneous process" of reference. * * * BISLEY. Pelt or drizzly, Weather--_Bisley_! * * *