Punch or the London Charivari, Vol.107, September 1, 1894 — John Shaqi
Punch or the London Charivari, Vol.107, September 1, 1894Various
General
Punch or the London Charivari, Vol.107, September 1, 1894
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Tuesday._--A precious sight, one worthy of the painter's or sculptor's
art, to see majestic figure of SQUIRE OF MALWOOD standing between House
of Lords and imminent destruction. Irish members and Radicals opposite
have sworn to have blood of the Peers. SAGE OF QUEEN ANNE'S GATE is
taking the waters elsewhere. In his absence do the best we can. Sat up
all last night, the Radicals trying to get at the Lords by the kitchen
entrance; SQUIRE withstanding them till four o'clock in the morning.
Began again to-night. Education Vote on, involving expenditure of six
millions and welfare of innumerable children. Afterwards the Post Office
Vote, upon which the Postmaster-General, ST. ARNOLD-LE-GRAND, endeavours
to reply to HENNIKER-HEATON without betraying consciousness of bodily
existence of such a person. These matters of great and abiding interest;
but only few members present to discuss them. The rest waiting outside
till the lists are cleared and battle rages once more round citadel of
the Lords sullenly sentineled by detachment from the Treasury Bench.
When engagement reopened SQUIRE gone for his holiday trip, postponed by
the all-night sitting, JOHN MORLEY on guard. Breaks force of assault by
protest that the time is inopportune. By-and-by the Lords shall be
handed over to tender mercies of gentlemen below gangway. Not just now,
and not in this particular way. CHIEF SECRETARY remembers famous case of
absentee landlord not to be intimidated by the shooting of his agent. So
Lords, he urges, not to be properly punished for throwing out Evicted
Tenants Bill by having the salaries of the charwomen docked, and BLACK
ROD turned out to beg his bread.
Radicals at least not to be denied satisfaction of division. Salaries
of House of Lords staff secured for another year by narrow majority
of 31.
_Business done._--Nearly all.
_Wednesday._--The SQUIRE OF MALWOOD at last got off for his well-earned
holiday. Carries with him consciousness of having done supremely well
amid difficulties of peculiar complication. As JOSEPH in flush of
unexpected and still unexplained frankness testified, the Session will
in its accomplished work beat the record of any in modern times. The
SQUIRE been admirably backed by a rare team of colleagues; but in House
of Commons everything depends on the Leader. Had the Session been a
failure, upon his head would have fallen obloquy. As it has been a
success, his be the praise.
"Well, good bye," said JOHN MORLEY, tears standing in his tender eyes as
he wrung the hand of the almost Lost Leader. "But you know it's not all
over yet. There's the Appropriation Bill. What shall we do if WEIR comes
up on Second Reading?"
"Oh, dam WEIR," said the SQUIRE.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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