Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, April 6, 1895Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, April 6, 1895
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Thursday._--Desperate dulness of week further relieved by discovery
of new game. TOMMY BOWLES, _Inv._ House just got into Committee of
Supply; Vote on Account under discussion; this covers multitudinous
items; every spending department of State concerned. When Committee
of Supply deals with Army Estimates, CAWMELL-BANNERMAN and the WINSOME
WOODALL in their places. The rest of Ministers may go away, knowing
that everything is well. The same when Navy Estimates are on, or
when particular votes in the Civil Service Estimates are to the fore.
Ministers of particular departments affected in their place; the rest
at liberty.
To-night, as no one knew who might be called on next, all agreed to
stop away--all but the faithful HIBBERT. Cap'en TOMMY, as usual, aloft
in the Crow's Nest, perceived this weak point. Hauling on the bowline,
and making all taut, he bore down swiftly on the Treasury Bench, and
hailed it for the President of the Board of Trade. Wanted to talk to
BRYCE, he said, about lighthouses. No one knew better than TOMMY that
BRYCE wasn't aboard. According to regulations, he ought to have been.
Search made for him. Presently brought in with hands in pockets,
trying to whistle, and otherwise present appearance of indifference.
But a poor show.
Encouraged by this success, Private HANBURY, observing ROBERTSON was
among absentees, addressed question to Civil Lord of Admiralty about
Peterhead Harbour. HIBBERT'S agony of mind at this juncture would have
softened harder hearts. An elderly hen, that has counted its brood
seven times, on each occasion finding one or two missing, not more
perturbed. Looked up and down Treasury Bench. ROBERTSON, not within
sight; might be below the Gangway. Vain hope. For Members opposite
interest in Peterhead Harbour growing keener and more urgent. FRANCIS
POWELL, usually mild-mannered man, went so far as to move to report
progress. MELLOR declined to put question.
"Very well," said the Blameless BARTLEY, with air of martyr. "We must
go on talking about Peterhead Harbour till the Minister comes in."
So he did, and when he ran dry TOMLINSON (having meanwhile ascertained
where Peterhead Harbour is) took up the wondrous tale. Talking when
HIBBERT reappeared, his breast now swelling with maternal pride and
satisfaction. He had found the lost chick, and clucked low notes of
supreme content as he brought him back to the roost. Pretty to see
how, Civil Lord in his place, all interest in Peterhead Harbour
subsided, Busy B's turning their attention to alleged felonious
underrating of Government property.
[Illustration: Sir John Leng strongly objects to Lion-taming
Exhibitions.]
_Business done._--Vote on Account through Committee. Sir JOHN LENG
calls ASQUITH'S attention to dangerous occupation of lion-tamers.
"All very well," he says, "for doughty knight like me. But these poor
fellows with families shouldn't be allowed to run risks."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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