Then spake King ARTHUR to Sir BEDIVERE:-- "O sombre Little-faith, miscalled the Bold! _Not if I know it!_ 'Tis a beauteous blade-- Broad, and bejewelled, and but lately gript By my long-waiting hand. I have it now, And if indeed I cast the brand away, Surely a craven donkey I shall be! What good should follow this, if this were done? What harm undone? By George! Sir BEDIVERE, 'Twixt frivolling GAWAIN and too doleful you, I have a pretty pair of knightly pals,-- Nay, I mean palfry'd knights!--to back me up. Is this the loyalty of the Table Round? Were MORDRED a worse traitor? or e'en he, The Midland Knight, who pushes for my place As he did for Sir LANCELOT'S? Oh, get out! What should my dauntless Derby henchmen say Should I, on Wednesday, show the feather white And say I'd chucked the sword Excalibur Away, unchallenged, in a fit of funk? I lose the sword? _I've not yet lost the scabbard!_ Nay, I shall flash it flaming in their sight, And brandish it, and promise swashing blows Of the keen blade, as ofttimes heretofore. I'll outshine TENNYSON, out-hero IRVING! Trust me 'tis not yet time for that weird arm, 'Clothed in white samite, mystic, wonderful,' To emerge from out the misty middle-mere And snatch from Me the Sword Excalibur!" [_Freezes on to it._ * * * * * CERTAIN.--Mr. KATO, the new Japanese Minister to Great Britain, is expected to be a success. On hearing his arguments, the observation that will spring to Lord ROSEBERY'S lips will be, "KATO, thou reasonest well." * * * * * [Illustration: A FRIENDLY WARNING. _First Tramp._ "I WADNA ADVISE YE TAE GANG UP THERE!" _Second Tramp._ "WHAT WYE? IS THERE A MUCKLE DOUG?" _First Tramp._ "NO; BUT THERES A DANGER O' WARK!"] * * * * * THAT PRECIOUS DONKEY! (_An Episode in the Life of A. Briefless, Junior, Esq., Barrister-at-Law, in Three Parts._) PART III.--_The Apotheosis of the Picture._ Those who have done me the distinguished honour of reading the story of my find of a genuine VON BÖOTZ (in my agitation last week I referred erroneously to the great master as Old BOOTS) will remember that I had got to the point where the picture I now so deeply prized had been removed by the handy-man to be sold, no doubt, at a crushing sacrifice. When put to it (as all my friends know) I am a man of an iron will and a steel determination. There is no sacrifice I will not make to carry a fixed plan into execution. It was this iron will and steel determination that enabled me (somewhat late in life) to conquer the apparently adamant intention of the Examiners at Lincoln's Inn and get called to the Bar. At this crisis in my life's history the reserve forces of my nature came to my assistance, and inspired me to hurry without a moment's delay to the dwelling-place of WILKINS.