Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, June 22nd, 1895 — John Shaqi
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, June 22nd, 1895Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, June 22nd, 1895
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
SCENE--_A railed-in corner of the Park._ TIME--_about_ 7 P.M.
_Inside the inclosure three shepherds are engaged in shearing
the park sheep. The first shepherd has just thrown his patient
on its back, gripped its shoulders between his knees, and
tucked its head, as a tiresome and obstructive excrescence,
neatly away under one of his arms, while he reaches for the
shears. The second is straddled across his animal, which is
lying with its hind legs hobbled on a low stage under an elm,
in a state of stoical resignation, as its fleece is deftly
snipped from under its chin. The third operator has almost
finished his sheep, which, as its dark gray fleece slips away
from its pink-and-white neck and shoulders, suggests a rather_
décolletée _dowager in the act of removing her theatre-cloak
in the stalls. Sheep, already shorn, lie and pant in shamed
and shivering bewilderment, one or two nibble the blades of
grass, as if to assure themselves that that resource is still
open to them. Sheep whose turn is still to come are penned up
at the back, and look on, scandalised, but with an air which
seems to express that their own superior respectability is a
sufficient protection against similar outrage. The shearers
appear to take a humorous view of their task, and are watched
by a crowd which has collected round the railings, with an
agreeable assurance that they are not expected to contribute
towards the entertainment._
_First Work-Girl_ (_edging up_). Whatever's goin' on inside 'ere?
(_After looking--disappointed._) Why, they aint on'y a lot o' sheep! I
thought it was Reciters, or somethink o' that.
[Illustration: "They ain't on'y a lot o' sheep! I thought it was
Reciters, or somethink o' that."]
_Second Work-Girl_ (_with irony_). They _look_ like Reciters,
don't they! It do seem a shime cuttin' them poor things as close as
convicks, that it do!
_First W. G._ They don't mind it partickler; you'd 'ear 'em 'oller
fast enough if they did.
_Second W. G._ I expeck they feel so ridic'lus, they 'aven't the 'art
to 'oller.
_Lucilla_ (_to_ GEORGE). Do look at that one going up and sniffing at
the bundles of fleeces, trying to find out which is his. _Isn't_ it
pathetic?
_George._ H'm--puts one in mind of a shy man in a cloak-room after a
party, saying feebly, "I rather think that's _my_ coat, and there's a
crush-hat of mine _somewhere_ about," eh?
_Lucilla_ (_who is always wishing that_ GEORGE _would talk more
sensibly_). Considering that sheep don't _wear_ crush-hats, I hardly
see how----
_George._ My dear, I bow to your superior knowledge of natural
history. Now you mention it, I believe it _is_ unusual. But I merely
meant to suggest a general resemblance.
_Lucilla_ (_reprovingly_). I know. And you've got into such a silly
habit of seeing resemblances in things that are perfectly different.
I'm sure I'm _always_ telling you of it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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