Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, May 25, 1895Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 108, May 25, 1895
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
Lazily, dreamily, we floated down the pellucid stream, ASPASIA at the
single thwart, I, her loved one, at the tiller. The last gleaner
had left the fields. Over the grave of the dead sun I saw the eye of
Hesperus, early and thoughtful. The words of the Poet Laureate came
back to me; it seemed that "in yonder Orient star a hundred spirits
whispered
[Illustration]
[_KEEP YOUR HAIR ON! Try our own Fertiliser. The Next-of-Kin-but-One
to the Hohenpfefferkorn dynasty writes:--"I have tried your lotion
for a vacancy in the crown, and should in all human probability have
succeeded, but for the birth of an infant in the direct line. Make
what use of this you like. It has been none to me."_]
"Peace!" Now the light shallop trembled to the stroke of ASPASIA'S
sculls, and the brawny muscles lifted beneath her flannel suiting.
Myself so frail, I adore the pride and prowess of womanhood, that
moves through the world conquering and to conquer. This life of the
open air, so free, so expansive, that despises the thought of
[_COHESIVE CORSETS.--Supply the want, or disguise the existence, of
adipose deposit. Send immediately a plaster cast of your bust. Insure
against fracture in the Parcel Post._]
control or seclusion, how different from that of men, studiously
repressed in a hothouse atmosphere of fashion and traditional
proprieties. We only guess of their world from hearsay or from books.
And most of these are by women for women, and Papa says they are not
fit for innocent men to read. And so we have to be content to study
dress and the lures that fascinate the other sex. But they--they go
forth to fight our battles, make our laws, have their part in the stir
and excitement of
[_THE BENEFICENT COVER SYSTEM.--You pay your money and we pocket it._
No further liabilities whatever.]
the world, while we sit at home and tattle over the tea-things and
marry when we're asked. And, _à propos_, how I longed to tell ASPASIA
that my heart is hers! But I am a man; it was for _her_ to speak.
At last she pulled herself together with the self-assurance of a woman
who knows that
[_OUR MATCHES STRIKE ONLY ON THE TROUSERS._]
the weaker sex is at her mercy. "Dear ARIEL," she began, and her deep
mulierile notes vibrated through my fluttering chest; "dear ARIEL,
this halcyon eve, this ethereal air that breathes the subtle incense
of eucalyptus--all, all, invite me to offer you
[_LITTLE TEASERS.--For the liver. As used in the Russo-Japanese
negotiations. The Arch-Prince General VON SCHPLITVISKI sends us the
following despatch:--"Plenipotentiary ITA BINO had a difference
with me on the question of a peninsula. Two of your LITTLE TEASERS,
however_, came home to him, _and he is now more amenable. You have
my authority for stating that your system of internal adjustment has
averted a disastrous and even stupid war."_
[_Left advertising._
* * * * *
OPERATIC NOTES.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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