Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 109, July 13, 1895Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 109, July 13, 1895
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Thursday._--Notable change come over BOLTONPARTY in the last
few days. Unmistakable Retreat-from-Moscow look about him. When Liberal
Government went out and JOSEPH handed THE MARKISS to
the front, BOLTONPARTY beamed with large content. The Sun of
Austerlitz shone once more.
"JOSEPH," he said, folding his arms in historic fashion,
letting his massive chin rest on his manly chest, what time his noble
brow shone with the radiance of mighty thoughts, "JOSEPH
will never forget his early friend and ally. It's not as if at the
last General Election I stood under his flag, won a seat, and laid
it at his feet. I fought North St. Pancras as a Home-Ruler, captured
it, and before new Parliament was many months old, went over to other
side, making early rift in lute of GLADSTONE'S majority. Some
men in such circumstances would have gone back to their constituency
and said, 'Dear boys, there's a mistake somewhere. You elected me on
a particular understanding. Since then I have taken another view of
the situation and of my duty. So I come back, return the trust you
placed in my hand, and give you opportunity of electing me again, or
choosing another man.' That might have led to inconvenience. Wouldn't
run any risk; so kept my seat, and voted steadily with JOSEPH.
Suppose they won't put me in the Cabinet right off? But I shall have
choice of first-class Under-Secretaryship. Shall it be War, Navy, or
Home Department? Any one excellent; but obviously I must go to the War
Office. Don't know whether there's any particular uniform for Financial
Secretary. If not, could soon knock one up from old portrait of the
Emperor."
[Illustration: Virtue Rewarded! The new Secretary of the Treasury, Mr.
H-nb-ry.]
Day after day BOLTONPARTY stayed at home, expecting every
hour to be sent for. Nothing came till Wednesday morning's papers
arrived, with, the news that son AUSTEN was Secretary to
the Admiralty, JESSE COLLINGS was installed at the Home
Office, and POWELL WILLIAMS--who never set a squadron
in the field, and didn't in any respect resemble the Emperor
NAPOLEON--was Financial Secretary to the War Office! "That's
bad enough, TOBY," said BOLTONPARTY, filing away an
iron tear that coursed down his steel-grey cheek. "But there's worse
behind. What do you think JOSEPH did when he heard I wasn't
all together pleased? He offered me a statue! Said he'd no doubt
AKERS-DOUGLAS could pick up on reasonable terms an old statue
of NAPOLEON; with a little touching up it would serve, and
there was a place ready on the site proposed for CROMWELL'S.
There was, he said, well-known picture of NAPOLEON Crossing
the Alps. Why shouldn't there be a statue of BOLTONPARTY
Crossing Marylebone Road, North Pancras? This is man's gratitude! I've
been cruelly Elba'd on one side, and nothing remains for me now but St.
Helena."
[Illustration: Toby runs down to his Constituency.]
_Business done._--All.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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