But jimminy-whizz, _'ow_ we squelched 'em! We got our man in two to one, Though our neighbourhood used to vote Rad, and a Tory was not in the run. Wot beans it must be to old 'ARCOURT, wot toko to LAWSON and CAINE! Well, they've got their fair arnser this time; let us 'ope they won't try it again. _Workin'-men_ on the _Radical_ ramp? You should jest 'ear wot _I_ 'ear, old pal. Let big pots make the round o' the pubs, and they won't talk that footy fal-lal. Labour wants steddy work and good wyges, and likes to see England look big; And then, with its baccy and beer, it's all one to it, Tory _or_ Whig. Wot's it care for Welsh Churches, or Scotch 'uns, as don't 'ardly enter its own? And as to 'Ome Rule--for yer worker there's dashed little meat on _that_ bone. Talk of Betterment, Progress, Peer-smashing, and such-like, may do for the Clubs; But all Labour _gits_ is 'igh rates, shocking trade, and a raid on its pubs. Workman sez it's too good enough, CHARLIE; believes as it's better by far To vote for Old SOL, a big Navy, an' maybe a olly good war. He's sick of the bloomin' old forriners copping our trade and our tin, And 'e's game for Protection _and_ Peers--_anythink_, so Old England may win! If the Rads wont his vote for the future, they've got somethink _solid_ to do! Village Councils and Vetoes won't work it, for all BILLY 'ARCOURT'S boohoo! 'E don't wont less beer, but more beer-money, ah! and 'e don't care a blow If 'e gits it from ROSEBERY and 'ARCOURT, or SOLSBURY, BALFOUR and JOE! But 'ang it, I'm preaching, old oyster, and giving them Rads the straight tip. One thing, they won't take it, this lot won't; they ain't got no savvy, no grip. Bin sloppin' all over the place like, a-fillin' their cup, and that rot, And now, arter tackling the pewter, they find as they've all gone to pot. O ain't it ske-rumptious, my pippin? I feel I could washup Brum JOE, And I'm bound to admit, next to Bung, us true Tories must thank _him_ this go. He's crumped 'is old pals a fair knock-out. If SOLSBURY'S saddle 'e'll carry, And run straight in 'arness with ARTHUR, _'e_'ll do! Yours, tolbobbishly, 'ARRY. * * * * * NOT THE ONLY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THEM.--Lord ROSEBERY the Derby Winner; Sir W. V. HARCOURT the Derby Loser. * * * * * [Illustration: UNLUCKY SPEECHES. _She_ (_giving him a flower_). "SWEET AS THE GIVER?" _He_ (_wishing to be very complimentary indeed_). "OH--SWEETER FAR!"] * * * * * DISSOLVING VIEWS. (_A Reminiscence of the Recent Elections._)