"BARKIS IS WILLIN-K."--There is great and just rejoicing in Liverpool over a repentant Liberal, by name Councillor WILLINK, who has joined the Conservative ranks. He would have joined before only "I thought," said he, "there was too much connection between the Conservatives and the drink trade. But now all that has completely changed," and he can, with an easy conscience, side with the Tory Party, which, he informs us, "he has been _testing during the last five years"!_ Really, after so prolonged and severe an ordeal, it is astonishing that there should be any Conservative Party left for Mr. WILLINK to throw his lot in with. However, it may with confidence be expected that he will prove as great a gain to his new cause as, undoubtedly, is the loss which he has inflicted upon his former partisans. * * * * * [Illustration: SHEER IGNORANCE. _Benevolent Person._ "COME, MY LITTLE MAN, YOU MUSTN'T CRY LIKE THAT!" _Boy._ "GARN! 'OW AM I TO CRY THEN?"] * * * * * "THE COMING OF ARTHUR." ["We understand that Mr. HENRY ARTHUR JONES, the dramatist, intends to drop the surname by which he has hitherto been known to the public. In future he will accordingly be known as Mr. HENRY ARTHUR."--_Daily News, October 30._] An eminent dramatist having abandoned one of his names, it is believed that the surname ARTHUR, henceforth so illustrious, will become extremely fashionable, and it is rumoured that the following gentlemen, amongst others, will re-arrange their names, and will immediately be elected members of ARTHUR'S Club:-- The Right Hon. JAMES BALFOUR ARTHUR; Mr. Justice CHARLES ARTHUR; Mr. Justice KEKEWICK ARTHUR; Sir ARNOLD ARTHUR; Sir SULLIVAN ARTHUR; Sir WILLIAM BLOMFIELD ARTHUR, A.R.A.; Mr. HACKER ARTHUR, A.R.A.; Mr. W. PINERO ARTHUR; Mr. CECIL ARTHUR; Mr. ROBERT S. ARTHUR. ** Our "ENRY HAUTHOR" is, as far as concerns dramatic authorship, "The Only JONES." Why descend from this pinnacle?--ED. * * * * * When is an ice rink not a nice rink? When it has no music and (skate) dancing license. * * * * * The Woman with a Past generally has many presents. * * * * * SOMETHING LIKE JUSTICE. VERY MUCH ABROAD. SCENE--_A Foreign Land._ Accused _in Dock_. Judge _on Bench_. _Usual accessories._ _Judge._ We say you are guilty, and there is no use in denying it. _Accused._ But I declare on my honour that I am innocent. _Judge._ Your honour! Who ever heard of a villain's honour! _Accused._ I am no villain. I swear it--yes, by my mother's grave. _Judge._ So wicked a criminal deserves no mother! [_Sensation._ _Accused._ Oh, this is monstrous! You may insult me; but you have no right to asperse the memory of my mother. _Judge._ Your mother would weep were she to see you now. She would be bowed down to the ground with shame.