Oh, Rads may talk of Ransom, but give me a dashing Hansom, A silk topper, and a decent run of luck,-- Cabby's luck; With a bay 'oss to my liking, and you won't ketch _me_ a striking, Not without good cause, as some old pals 'ave struck,-- Lately struck. Things may go a trifle 'ard 'twixt bad weather and the yard, But _that_ won't knock out the Piccadilly Pup,-- Dilly Pup. On my "SHREWSBURY and TALBOT," I'm as right as rain--or _all_ but,-- And there's music in the 'ail of Hansom Up!-- Hansom _Up!_ "_Hansom Up!_" I can tell yer, was chorussed a good 'un, and took most tremenjous. Collection that night-- For a broken-down Growler a-twist with rheumatics--was somethink to brim 'is wife's heyes with delight. Oh, charity's charity, _but_ when a Princess presides there's a extry strong pull at yer purse. And ditto with 'armony! That's 'uman nature; we're just built that way--an' _it might'a' bin worse!_ * * * * * "AFTER THE PLAY IS OVER." SCENE--_Smoking-room of recently re-opened Old-Established Club. Members discovered partaking of light refreshments._ _First Member_ (_sipping a lemon squash_). Yes, the Royalty is decidedly improved in appearance, and the audience, too, is quite up to the standard of the old _Ixion plus Black-eyed Susan_ days. Quite a pretty house, and quite a distinguished set in the auditorium. _Second Mem._ (_lighting a cigarette_). And the play? _First Mem._ Distinctly amusing. Both BOURCHIER and his wife excellent, and KATE PHILLIPS, as a sorrow-stricken cook, capital. Not quite sure whether it would not have been better to have left _M. le Directeur_ in France. He was there to the manner born; but in England--well, to put it plainly, the Home Office in Soho is not in the least like the Home Office in Whitehall. _Third Mem._ (_finishing a glass of "improved" soda water_). But is it intended to be? _Second Mem._ I don't know, but a good many of the audience (presumably the gentlemen of the pit and gallery) will adopt the assumption. After all, to be a member of the Civil Service is something, even in these degenerate days. The sketch of official life in Soho will not enhance the dignity of the--shall we call it?--profession. But concede that the local colouring is appropriate, and _The Chili Widow_ is simply first-rate. _Third Mem._ Better than _Bogey_ at the St. James's? _Second Mem._ So I have been told. And how about the Garrick? _First Mem._ _Alabama_, with WILLARD. Not particularly exciting. We know how good a man the popular actor can be, but for stage purposes he is much more pleasing as a villain. And TOOLE is back again in his own theatre?