Produced by Matt Whittaker, Malcolm Farmer and the Online Distributed Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net *** Transcriber's Note: Typo "Professsor" changed to "Professor" in the last paragraph of the last page. The symbol + was used to bracket where text appeared upside down in the original. *** PUNCH, OR THE LONDON CHARIVARI. VOL. 146. FEBRUARY 25, 1914. CHARIVARIA. THE GERMAN CROWN PRINCE has the mumps. It seems that his Imperial Father was not consulted in the matter beforehand, and further domestic differences are anticipated. * * * KING SISOVATH of Cambodia, we learn from _Le Petit Journal_, was so pleased with a white elephant sent him by the Governor-General of French Indo-China that he has raised the animal--a fine female--to the dignity of a Princess. The news soon got about, and considerable jealousy is felt at our Zoo, where there is not so much as even a baronet among the inmates. * * * General VON PLETTENBURGH, commanding the Prussian Guards Corps, has issued a decree against the wearing of the so-called "tooth-brush" moustache, pointing out that such an appendage is unsuitable for a Prussian soldier and "not consonant with the German national character." The implication is very unpleasant. * * * "It is generally reported," says a contemporary, "that Sir EDWARD GREY speaks no German, and French very badly. M. VENIZELOS, the Greek Prime Minister, declared that he had the greatest difficulty in understanding Sir EDWARD'S French." As a matter of fact a little bird tells us that on this occasion our Foreign Secretary was speaking Greek. * * * "Mr. Asquith," said _The Times_, "in a massage to the Liberal candidate for South Bucks, emphasizes the prime importance of the Irish issue." There is, of course, nothing like massage for rubbing things in. * * * Herr BALLIN, head of the Hamburg-American Line, and Herr HEINEKEN, head of the rival North-German Lloyd Company, came to London last week, and are said to have concluded peace in the Atlantic rate war. We understand that the arrangement is to be known as the Pool of London. * * * The authorities at Barotse, _The Globe_ tells us, have put a price on the heads of all lions there. One can picture the mean sportsman, with a pair of field-glasses, picking out the cheapest before firing. * * * "61,000 TERRITORIALS SHORT." _Daily Mail._ Still, it is pretty generally recognised now that a small man may make every bit as good a soldier as a big one, and, besides, there is always less of him to hit. * * * Among the temporary teachers appointed to carry on schools in Herefordshire during the teachers' strike was an asylum attendant. This confirms the report that many of the children were mad at finding that the schools did not close in consequence of the strike. * * *