"Van Ruiter," said Ginger severely, "is a painter in oils. His work has been known to fetch as much as seventy-five pounds. As for his school, there _was_ a man of that name at Marlborough with me. And as the canvas of 'The Two Windmills' is dated 1912 it might be him." * * * * * [Illustration: _Chauffeur of Large Car_ (_who has been admonished for taking up too much of the narrow road_). "Garn! If there ain't enough room for yer, put that thing on yer foot and roller-skate with it on the pavement."] * * * * * A CHILD AMONG THE PROPHETS. _The Evening News_ called attention to the following as one of the "special features" of a recent issue:-- "FORECASTS OF SPRING MILLINERY By Miss Bessie Ascough (Age 7)." * * * * * MIRANDA'S WILL. I am not legal adviser to Miranda's family; nevertheless she came to see me on business the other day. I saw at once by her serious air that it was something of first-rate importance. "I want a will," she said; "one of those things that people leave when they die." "Some people leave them and some don't," I said. "I mean the things that show who is to have your belongings." "Undoubtedly you mean wills." "Do you sell them?" "Sometimes." "I should like to see some." "What size?" I asked facetiously. "Sixes--long ones," said Miranda, looking at her hands. "I remember," I murmured. Miranda looked up with a start and assumed her severest expression. "I'm afraid you're not treating the matter seriously. Perhaps I had better go to father's solicitor; he's older and quite serious. But then he's rather bald and uninteresting. I think he takes snuff." I retorted in my most professional manner. "I beg your pardon; I think you must have misunderstood me. I meant that all wills are not quite the same; some are longer than others." "Not too long, then," she said. "You might show me some medium size ones. I should like to do the thing fairly well." "We don't exactly stock them; they're generally made to order." "I'm sorry; I wanted one at once. You know I was twenty-one the other day." (I knew it to my cost.) "Father says that everyone over twenty-one ought to make a will." "Your father's views on the subject are very sound. If you'll give me your instructions, I'll make you one." I spread a sheet of paper in front of me. "But surely you can make a will without my help?" "Not very easily. It's something like being measured for a gown. I must know what you have to leave and to whom you wish to leave it." "But I don't want anybody to know." "I'm not anybody." "I know. I don't think, though, that I quite care to tell you." "Then I'm afraid there'll be some little difficulty about executing your wishes in the matter." "How much do wills cost?" she asked irrelevantly. "It depends on the length." "How much a yard?" "We mostly sell them by the folio, not by the yard."