It took us a long time to harness the goat properly because it was so fidgety. There wasn't much room in the cart, but we both managed to squeeze in, and Faithful ran on in front. The goat doesn't like Faithful; it has an aversion to him when he bays. Faithful knew the goat was coming after him because he could hear the bell. There was more room for Jimmy when I fell out, but Faithful kept straight in the middle of the road doing the side-stroke as hard as he could with both hands. I could hear the bell. Jimmy said a horse and trap climbed over the hedge to let them pass. The man in the trap said something to Jimmy, but Jimmy couldn't catch what he said; it was such a long sentence. Jimmy said they went into an ironmonger's shop, all of them. Faithful got there first. He deployed amongst some buckets which were outside the shop. So did the goat. The noise disturbed the ironmonger. He took his wife and children into the cellar. Jimmy said it was the noise that did it, and the goat's face. The ironmonger's wife told Jimmy she had had a shock; she spoke to him out of the cellar window. Jimmy says she had a catch in her breath. The goat didn't go back to the field very quickly; it was because one of the wheels was bent and the goat seemed to have caught a hiccough. That was because it ran so fast after eating the newspaper, Jimmy says. He says all goats are like that. The goat won't eat out of Jimmy's hand now; whenever it sees Jimmy it tries to climb a tree. A boy told Jimmy that the man who owns the goat is concerned about it, so Jimmy goes hunting German spies with Faithful down another road now. * * * * * The Two Blüchers. A century since, joy filled our cup To hear of BLÜCHER "coming up"; To-day joy echoes round the town To hear of _Blücher_ going down. * * * * * [Illustration: IN ORDER THAT NO POSSIBLE MEANS OF INJURING ENGLAND MAY BE NEGLECTED, IT IS UNDERSTOOD THAT THE GERMAN PROFESSORS OF NECROMANCY AND WITCHCRAFT HAVE BEEN REQUESTED TO MAKE THE BEST USE OF THEIR MAGICAL POWERS.] * * * * * ZEPPELIN DRILL. I had often seen the little lady at No. 4, but it is only lately that I have discovered that there is in her the makings of a General. We found out about her strategic dispositions in a roundabout way. Her maid told the milkman, and in the course of nature the news came to us. Every night her maid carries into her room a fur coat, a large pair of boots and a coal-scuttle. It is, of course, her preparation to meet a Zeppelin attack. Everybody is getting ready. Bulpitt's wife's mother, for example--Bulpitt is my next-door neighbour--is making him dig a bomb-proof hole in the garden. Bulpitt thought there might be some difficulty about getting her into it. I pointed out that there would be more difficulty in getting her out--the hole is very deep. He said he didn't worry about that.