He took off his spectacles and rubbed them mechanically. It gave him a very detached appearance and he spoke gently, without malice. "I have an aunt," he said, "by self-election, a most worthy woman, who was my mother's cousin. It came to her ears that I had become a teetotaler for the duration of the war. It appears that there is a badge for temporary teetotalers. She brought me one. She begged me with tears in her eyes to wear it. I remonstrated. I pointed out that if every public and private virtue is to be symbolised in this fashion, people with few vices and a willing heart would soon be perpetually in fancy-dress." "And what happened?" I asked. "I wavered for a time and then happily I found a way out. A few days ago it occurred to me that there must be other means, as yet untried, of advertising one's patriotism. I saw a notice in a restaurant I sometimes go to, 'No Germans or Austrians Employed Here.' 'Happy proprietor,' I said, 'who can so trumpet his honesty without increasing either his badges or his armlets!' The fact is that it set me thinking. Eventually I hit on a plan. It was very disappointing to my aunt, but it answers wonderfully." "May I ask?" I said; "it might be useful." "Oh, certainly, certainly. We have bought a little enamelled plate and had it fixed to our gate. You may have noticed it. It has the words, 'No Bottles.'" * * * * * THE MASCOT. [Illustration: _Adoring Damsel._ "And you _will_ wear it always, _won't_ you?" _Popular young Sub._ "Thanks awfully. It's frightfully decent of you, and all that, but--er--you see, there's a lot of other little chaps waitin' to do their bit; I'm afraid he'll have to take his turn with the rest." ] * * * * * THE WATCH DOGS.