These are the joys, of which I give the gist, Secured to those who trust the KAISER's fist, Which to the infidel is hard as nails Or eagles' claws whereat the coney quails, But to the Faithful, such as you, Senussis, Is softer than the velvet paws of pussies. O. S. * * * * * From a story in _The Glasgow Herald_:-- "'He had his feathers ruffled that time, anyway,' laughed my husband, as he followed me whistling into the house." It isn't every woman that has a husband who can talk and laugh and whistle all at once. Was he the clever man in the French tale, we wonder, who chanted a Scottish air, accompanying himself on the bag-pipes? * * * * * "Fire has broken out in an oven in Kafr Zarb, near Suez, completely destroying the fire brigade extinguishing the blaze." _Egyptian Mail._ Serve them right for their officiousness. * * * * * "Wanted, Experienced Ruler (female); permanency." _Bristol Times and Mirror._ Might suit a widow. * * * * * NAUTICAL TERMS FOR ALL. (_By our Tame Naval Expert._) It is really surprising what confusion exists in the public mind upon the exact significance of such elementary terms as "Command of the Sea," and "A Fleet in Being." Only yesterday evening I was asked by a fellow-traveller on the top of a bus why, if we had command of the sea, we didn't blow up the Kiel Canal! It will be as well to begin at the beginning. What is Naval Warfare? It is an endeavour by sea-going belligerent units, impregnated (for the time being) with a measure of _animus pugnandi_ and furnished with offensive weapons, to impose their will upon one another. In rather more technical language it may be described as fighting in ships. Now in order to utilize the sea for one's own purposes and at the same time to deny, proscribe, refuse and restrict it to one's enemy it is essential to obtain COMMAND. And it must not be overlooked that Command of the Sea can only be established in one way--by utilizing or threatening to utilize sea-going belligerent units. But we must distinguish between Command of the Sea and Sea Supremacy, and again between Potential Command, Putative Command and Absolute Command. Finally let there be no confusion between the expressions "Command of the Sea" and "Control of the Sea," which are entirely different things--though both rest securely upon the doctrine of the Fleet in Being, which is at the foundation of all true strategy.