My great-great-great-great-grandfather was a robust Devon yeoman who fought with DRAKE in the Spanish main, but subsequently married the daughter of a Spanish Admiral, made captain at the time of the Armada, Count Guzman Intimidad Larranaga. The daughter, Pomposa Seguidilla, came to England to share her father's imprisonment, and my ancestor fell in love with her and married her. She was a vivacious brunette with nobly chiselled features and fine Castilian manners. Their son Alonzo married Mary Lyte of Paddington, so that I trace my descent to the Lytes of London as well as to the grandees of Spain.... Incredibly also I was one of the Hopes of England. And now, when London has no light any more, I take pen in hand to retrace the steps of my wonderful journey through the ages. Ah me! _Eheu fugaces!_ * * * * * Among my early reading nothing made so much impression on me as _Mrs. Glasse's Cookery Book_, and I still remember the roars of laughter that went up when I read out a famous sentence in my childish way: "First tatch your hair." Those words have stuck to me through life and have had a deep influence on my career. Strange how little we know at the time which are our vital moments. * * * * * I remember standing, when still only of tender years, listening to Bow bells and vowing that, if I grew up, I would so reflect my life in my writings that no experience however trifling should be without its recording paragraph. I would tell all. And I am proud to say I have kept that vow. I have not even concealed from my readers the names of the hotels I have stayed in, and if I have liked the watering-places I have resisted every temptation not to say so. Odd how childish aspirations can be fulfilled! * * * * * [Illustration: _Tommy._ "Hold hard, young feller. You shouldn't butt in like that--plenty of room behind." _His Girl._ "Leave him alone, Harry. He thinks it's a recruiting office."] * * * * * "A Young Country Girl, 18, wishes a situation as Housemaid or Betweenmaid; never out before; wages not objected to." _Irish Times._ Very nice of her to be so accommodating. * * * * * "Col. J. W. Wray and Mrs. Wray entertained the recruiting staff, numbering L21, to tea at Brett's Hall, Guildford, on Thursday." _Provincial Paper._ Sterling fellows, evidently. * * * * * [Illustration: "Us have had a letter from our Jarge. He've killed three Germans!" "I bain't zurprised! Lor'! How that boy did love a bit o' rattin', or anything to do with vermin!"] * * * * * THE FLYING MAN. When the still silvery dawn uprolls And all the world is "standing to;" When young lieutenants damn our souls Because they're feeling cold and blue--