O emblem of British decorum, Whose vogue, for a century back, In the Mart, in the House or the Forum Few dared to impugn or attack; 'Tis sad, though the best of our bankers Refuse to allow such a lapse, That our youth irrepressibly hankers For straws and for caps. _Mr. Seagram_, in _Masterman Ready_, Is pictured in many a hole, And in postures however unsteady, With his chimney-pot hat on his poll; And our highly respected grand-paters, When wielding their golf-clubs or bats, Or proving their prowess as skaters, Wore cylinder hats. Worn straight by the priggish or surly Thou didst not enthuse or beguile; But tilted a little and curly Of brim--how seductive thy style! And never was pride that is proper Sartorially better expressed Than when an immaculate topper Sat light on one's crest. The cult of the bicycle, tending To foster a laxer array, And the motor, its influence lending, Both seriously threatened thy sway; But the War, most unfairly combining The motives of comfort and thrift, Thy glory, so sleek and so shining, Has finally biffed. Yet I cannot observe thy dethroning Or watch thy effulgence depart Without unaffectedly owning A pang of regret in my heart. I know thou wast stuffy, non-porous, Unstable, top-heavy and hot; But O! thou wast grimly decorous; The bowler is not. * * * * * Agreed. "Original and inspiring as are Mr. Chesterton's writings, the man is very much bigger than his works."--_Everyman._ * * * * * "TOWN PLUNGED IN DARKNESS. Population Warned by Syrens and buzzards." _Evening Paper._ "_Our_ little town," writes the correspondent who sends us the above cutting, "was warned by dryads and wombats." And of course there is the well-known case of the Roman geese and the Capitol. * * * * * "Organist (willing to help train choir) wanted for country parish. Might suit clergyman's daughter."--_Church Times._ He might, no doubt; but it is not safe to count on these affinities. * * * * * "The Manchester City Council on Wednesday decided to accept the free use of Professor W. B. Bottomley's patients for the conversion of raw peat by means of bacteria." _Provincial Paper._ If we were the patients we should make a small charge for the loan of the germs. * * * * * "There has been a naval skirmish in the Baltic, where the elusive Goeben has been engaged by the Russians with the usual result--the escape of the fugitive battle-cruiser behind the mined defences of the Bosphorus." _The Dominion (Wellington, N.Z.)_ It must have been a fine sight to see this elusive vessel jump right across Russia and back again. * * * * *