The owners of certain proprietary whiskeys have decided to put them up sixpence a bottle. In response to this move the owners of certain proprietary sixpences have decided not to put them down. *** A correspondent of _The Times_ states that large numbers of Owls have taken to visiting the trenches in Flanders. The War Office, strangely enough, professes to know nothing of the circumstance. * * * * * [Illustration: THE ROYAL GONDOLIERS. WE UNDERSTAND THAT OUR COURTEOUS ALLIES IN VENICE HAVE OFFERED TO SUPPLY FLOATING FACILITIES FOR OUR TROOPS IN THE FLOODED TRENCHES OF FLANDERS.] * * * * * For Conscientious Objectors. "VARICOSE VEINS.--We stock all sizes, in best quality only."--_Advt. in Irish Paper._ * * * * * British Frightfulness. "A young woman was fried as a spy in London the other day."--_Sunday Pictorial._ * * * * * A Leap-Year Reminder. "February 29, 1916.--Last day for single men."--_Liverpool Daily Post._ * * * * * "We ... are no haters of peace. We want it more than anything in the world--except the triumph of evil."--_Star._ "A fallen star," we fear. * * * * * "Mr. Lloyd George said that Cabinet Ministers had agreed to take one-fourth of their salaries in Exchequer bombs." _Provincial Paper._ The times call for strong measures, but we think this is going a little too far. * * * * * TEUTON OVERTURES. As seen through Teuton Eyes. These English--who can know their ways? When, flushed with triumphs large and many, We condescend with tactful signs To hint of peace on generous lines They answer in a flippant phrase That they're "not taking any." When from our conquering High-Seas Ark (Detained at home by stress of weather) We loosed the emblematic dove, Conveying overtures of love, Back came the bird with that remark, Minus its best tail feather. They said they never wanted war; Yet, when we talk of war's abating, And name the price for them to pay, They have the curious nerve to say That, when they please, and not before, They'll do their own dictating. How can you deal with minds so slow, With men who give no indication That we by any further shock Into their heads can hope to knock Enough intelligence to know That they're a beaten nation? Odd that we cannot make it clear That we have won; and even odder That other markets seem to jump, While our exchange is on the slump, And everything's starvation-dear (Excepting cannon-fodder). O. S. * * * * * RECONSTRUCTION.