Mr. BOTTOMLEY, on the contrary, was all sting and no statesmanship. I gather that he has been conducting an unofficial conference on his own, and as the result of his conversations with distinguished but anonymous foreign statesmen has arrived at quite different conclusions from those of the PRIME MINISTER. The fact that he was kept waiting on the pier at Boulogne while the British Delegation went off in a special steamer, on which he was not invited to embark, may have imparted an extra spice of rancour to his strictures. * * * * * [Illustration: _Betty (hearing the cuckoo's call the first time)._ "MUMMY, DEAR, DO ALL THE OTHER DICKY-BIRDS HAVE TO GO AND FIND IT NOW?"] * * * * * [Illustration: _Customer._ "I SEE CORONODORAS ARE GOING TO BE FIVE SHILLINGS EACH NOW." _Barber's Assistant._ "WELL, WE SHALL 'AVE TO SMOKE 'EM NEARER THE END, THAT'S ALL."] * * * * * HIGH-BROWS, LTD. Whenever we spend a week in London we never seem to find time for the things we really want to do. After dinner, on our last night at home, I say to Angela, "Let's see--have we any engagements this trip?" And Angela answers, "Don't you remember? We're dining with the Hewetsons on Thursday, and on Saturday the Etheridges are taking us to a symphony concert. Then there's your sister." "Oh, ring her up, and suggest we come to dinner on Sunday. We don't want to waste a proper night on Nellie." "All right. That leaves us four evenings for ourselves. I suppose you want to see the Quartermasters' Exhibition at Olympia?" "What's that?" "I can't think which part of the newspapers you read. Why, they've had columns and columns about it." "Ah, that's how I missed it. I only look at the 'late news.' It seems a waste of time to read the rest." "Well, it's an exhibition showing the wonderful work done by Quartermasters in the War. There are Quartermasters checking stores----" "Are they shown wondering where they ought to stand on a battalion parade?" "I don't know about that; but we see them indenting for coal----" "And regretting their inability to issue same?" "Very likely. Anyhow, everything is arranged practically under the actual conditions. The exhibition started in an Army hut in St. James's Park, but proved such a success it had to be moved to Olympia. Why, Mr. CHURCHILL was there one day this week." "Did he make a speech?" "He either made a speech or left by a side-door. I can't remember now, but I know he was there." "Why can't we go in the afternoon?" "They say it's better at night, because the whole place is lit up by hurricane lanterns and looks like fairyland." "Oh, very well. That leaves us three evenings. We----"