A Madras tiger cub, we are informed, has been born at Pontypridd. We can only suppose that the animal did not know it was Pontypridd. * * * Futurist painters, says a contemporary, are becoming scarce in America. The wave of crime that followed the War seems to be falling off. * * * The Department Committee of the Falkland Islands suggest that whales should be marked by a small projectile. This is much better than screwing the monster into a vice and carving its name and address on it with a chisel. * * * A Beachy Head correspondent writes to a daily paper to say that he has seen a peculiarly bright light in the sky. Quite a number of people are asking, Can it be the sun? * * * A morning paper reports that the Government is now offering for sale all machinery, fixtures and fittings installed in a certain large aerodrome in Hampshire. It is rumoured that they will be willing to buy them back from the purchasers at an enhanced price in order to equip a new aerodrome in the same locality. * * * According to a witness at Willesden Police Court a carter charged with insulting behaviour swore for twenty minutes without repeating himself. We understand that the Bargees' Union take a very serious view of the matter. * * * "The cost of cremation is now exceptionally low," announces a Sunday paper. Inexpensive luxuries are so rare in these days that one is tempted to give it a trial. * * * Replying to Sir K. FRASER, Mr. AUSTEN CHAMBERLAIN stated that he was not prepared to levy an equalizing tax on total abstainers. The belief that they are already sufficiently punished is widely held. * * * "Man, naturally funny, desires to be trained for stage funny-man" (_Times_ Advertisement). The initial handicap is bound to tell against him. He should try the House of Commons. * * * Twenty-one pigs have died at Woking as the result of eating phosphorus. The owner was apparently unaware that it has taken years to accustom the American pig to a phosphorus diet. * * * Hythe Council is offering sixpence a dozen for dead wasps. Hunters may bring their captures in on the hoof but must slaughter them before they can touch the money. * * * A South Wales miner charged with trapping birds was found to be wearing three coats. As this might have been due to an oversight on the part of his valet it was not included in the charge. * * * * * [Illustration: THE THINGS WE WRITE. "SIR POMPEY AND HIS GUESTS LITERALLY SWAM IN CHAMPAGNE."] * * * * * Our Tireless Terpsichoreans. "Miss ----'s dance will take place on the 22nd and terminate on the 29th for this season."--_Advt. in Provincial Paper._ * * * * * "That fine sporting neighbourhood, Epsom, is represented by a big cheque from the town cub."--_Evening Paper._ Good dog! * * * * *