Mr. ALLDAY, a resident in Lundy Island for twenty years, who has just arrived in London, states that he has never seen a tax-collector. There is some talk of starting a fund with the object of presenting him with one. * * * Dunmow workhouse is offered for sale. A great many people are anxious to buy it with the object of putting it aside for a rainy day. * * * A Houndsditch firm has just had a telephone installed which was ordered six years ago. This, however, is not a record. Quite a number of instruments have been fitted up in less time than this. * * * We understand that the thunderbolt which fell at Chester is not the one that the PREMIER intended to drop this month. * * * Signor CAPRONI, lecturing in New York, says that aeroplanes capable of carrying five hundred passengers will shortly be constructed. We can only say that anybody can have our seat. * * * Since _The Daily Express_ tirade against the officials of the Zoo visitors are requested not to go too near the Fellows. * * * "The French army," says the _Berliner Tageblatt_, "will soon be all over." It does not say what; but if our late enemy continues the violation of the Peace Treaty the missing word should be "Germany." * * * Birds, says _The Times_, are nesting in the plane-trees of Printing House Square. Some of the fledglings, we are informed, are already learning to whistle the familiar Northcliffe air, "LLOYD GEORGE Must Go," quite distinctly. * * * The National Portrait Gallery, occupied by the War Office since 1914, has just been reopened. The rumour that a Brigadier-General who had eluded all attempts to evacuate him was still hanging about disguised as a portrait of Mrs. SIDDONS attracted a large attendance. * * * The Corporation of Waterford has refused to recognise "Summer" time. One gathers that it is still the winter of their discontent down there. * * * Sinn Feiners are now asking for the abolition of the Royal Irish Constabulary, and it is feared that, unless their request is granted, they may resort to violence. * * * * * [Illustration: "THOUGH THE MATERIAL, SIR, IS SOMEWHAT MORE EXPENSIVE, THE LEATHER BRACE HAS THE GREAT ADVANTAGE THAT IT LASTS FOR EVER; AND, MOREOVER, WHEN IT WEARS OUT IT MAKES AN EXCELLENT RAZOR-STROP."] * * * * * "Mrs. ---- Requires useful Ladies' Maid, for Bath and country; only ex-soldier or sailor need apply."--_Provincial Paper._ A job that will obviously need a man of proved courage. * * * * * WISDOM UP TO DATE--12TH EDITION.