He said there were many possible reasons to account for the non-arrival of my cheque. I might, for example, be abroad, somewhere out of reach of postal facilities, or perhaps the cheque had been lost in the post. Of one thing only he was sure--there had been no parsimonious intent on my part. I was able in some sort to relieve his mind of anxiety by mentioning that I was still a resident at the address in Cheshire under which I last wrote to him. I even assured him that, so long as my tailor did not forsake his present attitude of friendly remonstrance, it was improbable that I should proceed abroad. Nor had I as yet any reason to suspect that great public institution, the post. The fact was that I still had the matter in view. As regards the pictures, I said that I had a friend who was in love with the daughter of an A.R.A., and who, in telling me about a financial controversy between himself and his prospective father-in-law, had let slip the information that a slump in artists' prices was imminent. In view of this I suggested that the agreement with the artists commissioned by the club should for the present be a verbal one and elastic in its wording. In the last part of my letter I reviewed the history of my own connection with the club, covering a period of five years. I recalled the epoch-making day when I received my first letter from Mr. Secretary--a letter acquainting me of the fact that I was a full-blown member--all but, at least. What was thirty guineas? And each year since then, I reminded him, I had disbursed a further ten guineas without a murmur. On the other side of the account I showed in tabulated form all the change the club had given back: _d._ Use of soap, 1916 0-1/2 Laundering of towel, ditto 3 Use of soap, 1919 1 Laundering of towel, ditto 3 Fifty per cent. excess for ditto 1-1/2 Stolen: Three matches, one tooth-pick 0-1/4 ---- Total 9-1/4 I pleaded a moral right to dispose of the balance. I suggested that seventy-three pounds nine shillings and twopence three-farthings (waiving the question of interest) might be sufficient to buy a third War picture, the interior of a Government office during the tea-hour, or something of that sort. I begged that he would lay the matter before the Committee. I am not very hopeful about my letter. Probably he has spent that seventy-three pounds odd already on stationery and postage-stamps. I think that, if it finds its way into print, I may send him half the proceeds of this article. No harm in keeping the matter in view, at all events. * * * * * MUSICAL NOTES. (_By our Modernist Critic_).