"Well, I'm pleased to have met you," he concluded, still smiling amiably through the window; "if ever you strike Rapid City, Wis., you'll find me rustling wood somewheres near the saloon. I'd like to have got better acquainted, but I promised the folks I'd stop off here and get wise as to how boys is raised in your country. They sure grow up fine men. I reckon we 're way behind the times in Rapid City----" The train passed out leaving me speechless with indignation. It took me some moments to recover my normal balance. Then I confess I was delighted to notice that the fellow, in his enthusiasm over the alleged lightness of my fingers, had left his precious "grip" behind him. It travelled with me to my destination. I hope it is still travelling. * * * * * [Illustration: MORE HASTE, LESS MEAT. _The Calf_ (_to the Butcher of the Exchequer_). "OH, SIR, IT SEEMS SUCH A PITY TO KILL ME. YOU'D GET SO MUCH MORE OFF ME LATER ON."] * * * * * [Illustration: WHEN EXPERTS DIFFER. _Junior Partner_ (_in syndicate whose operations on the 2.30 race--six furlongs--have gone wrong_). "THERE--DIDN'T I TELL YER DIAMOND'S PRIDE WAS A FIVE-FURLONG 'ORSE?"] * * * * * ON APPROVAL. John looked up from his paper. "Ah!" he sighed loudly, "how the world progresses." There was silence. John sighed again. "How the world progresses," he said a shade louder. Cecilia and I continued reading. "Can't _anyone_ ask a question?" asked John peevishly. "Where do the flies go in the winter-time?" murmured Cecilia without looking up. I was weak enough to laugh. For some reason it annoyed John. "Go on, go on, laugh!" he spluttered; "you're a good pair, you and your sister. Say something else funny, Cecilia, and make little brother laugh. What a crowd to have married into! Shrieks of laughter at every feeble joke, but as for intelligent conversation----" "Well, we're reading," said Cecilia; "we don't want intelligent conversation." "There's no need to tell me that. I know it only too well. I haven't been married to you for all these years without seeing that." "'All these years,'" repeated Cecilia, aghast. "The vindictive brute." "And," continued John bitterly, "I say again what I said just now: How the world progresses." "Well, there's no need to keep on saying it, dear old cauliflower," I said; "we _know_ it progresses. What are we expected to say?" "I know," said Cecilia brightly. "_Why?_" John pulled himself up. "Because," he said, "they are proposing in the paper here to start a system of temporary marriages which can be dissolved if either party is dissatisfied after a fair trial. I only wish somebody had thought of it--how many?--eight years ago." Cecilia's jaw dropped. I chuckled. "You certainly bought that one all right, Cecilia old dear," I said. "Can't you manage a witty retort? Try, sister, for the honour of the family."