"Tuesday next, I may explain, is Belfastese for Tuesday next, and means to-day."--_Daily Paper_. * * * * * GENEROSITY AT THE GROCER'S: "Provided you get one bad egg from us, we will on your returning it give you two for it." * * * * * From an engineer's letter:-- "We are exhibiting ----'s Patent Nibbling Machine at the Laundry Trades Exhibition." We have often wondered how our collars get those crinkled edges. * * * * * "The club before declaring at 5 wickets had put up a formidable score of 341, Major Ireland making 434 and Capt. Green 127. Capt. M.A. Green, stpd. Mistri b. Evan ... 27 Maj. K.A. Ireland, c. & b. Bignall ...... 134 Newnham, b. Evans ......................... 4 Lieut. Foley, b. Evans .................... 4 Maj. Englefield, b. Powers ............... 22 Lieut. Cambon not out .................... 15 Extras ................................... 35 Total for 5 wickets misdeclared ......... 341 _Egyptian Gazette._ We thought from the start that something was wrong. * * * * * [Illustration: _The Rector._ "VERY NICE, MRS. BROWN. VERY CREDITABLE INDEED. BUT PERSONALLY I CONSIDER THE MARROW A MUCH OVERRATED VEGETABLE, APART, OF COURSE, FROM ITS DECORATIVE VALUE AT HARVEST FESTIVALS."] * * * * * NIMROD. Nimrod he was a hunter in the days of long ago, Caring little for things of state, little for things of show; When the unenlightened around him squabbled for wealth or fame NIMROD fled to the forests and gave himself up to Game. I've never been told what jungles old NIMROD called his own, Or studied the "Sportsman's Record" he scratched on a shoulder-bone; I haven't heard what he shot with nor even what game he slew, But I know he was fore-forefather to fellows like me and you. He stood to the roaring tiger, he stood to the charging gaur; His was the love of the hunting which is more than the lust of war; He knew the troubles of tracking, the business of camps and kits, And the pleasure that pays for the pain of all--the ultimate shot that hits. Now I've nowhere seen it stated, but I'm certain the thing occurred, That when NIMROD came to his death-bed he sent his relatives word, And said to his sons and his people ere his spirit obtained release, "You follow the trails I taught you and your ways will bring you peace." Wherefore--as now and to-morrow--when the souls of men were sick, When wives were fickle or fretful or the bills were falling thick, When the youth was minded to marry and the maiden withheld consent, Heeding the words of NIMROD, they packed their spears and went--