As a result of the revival of the "Apes _v._ Angels" controversy, in which Canon BARNES has taken so prominent a part, and Mr. BOTTOMLEY has declared himself as a whole-hearted supporter of DARWIN (_vide_ his article in _The Sunday Pictorial_), hands will be supple and boneless this autumn, as in fashionable portraits. This reversion to the prehensile type of hand, so noticeable in the chimpanzee, has its drawbacks, and the rigidity necessary for certain manual functions, such as winding up a motor or opening a champagne bottle, will be furnished by gloves of a stiffer and stronger fabric, ranging from simulation leatherette to chain-mail. Owing to the continued over-crowding of trains, tubes and motor-buses, elbows will be more prominent and aggressive than ever, and tailors are building a type of coat calculated to relieve the strain on this useful joint by a system of progressive padding, soft inside but resembling a nutmeg-grater at the point of contact with the enemy. It only remains to be added that in consequence of the publication of the Jewish Protocol and other documents pointing to revolutionary and anarchical Semitic activities, noses will be worn straighter and _a la Grecque_, and for similar reasons feet will be shorter and with more uplift in the instep. * * * * * =A Hot Spell.= From a story for boys:-- "The heat was so intense that we were perspiring from every paw." * * * * * [Illustration: SNOWED UNDER. THE ST. BERNARD PUP (_to his Master_). "THIS SITUATION APPEALS TO MY HEREDITARY INSTINCTS. SHALL I COME TO THE RESCUE?" [Before leaving Switzerland Mr. LLOYD GEORGE purchased a St. Bernard pup.]] * * * * * [Illustration: _Futurist to Brother Brush (after along country walk in search of a subject)._ "THIS IS RATHER JOLLY. WHAT A RELIEF IT IS TO GET AMONGST THE REAL JAGGED STUFF."] * * * * * THE OLD WOMAN'S HOUSE ROCK, SCILLY. "Old woman, old woman, old woman," said I, "'Tis a mighty queer place to be building a home In the teeth of the gales and the wash of the foam, With nothing in view but the sea and the sky; It cannot be cheerful or healthy or dry. Why don't you go inland and rent a snug house, With fowls in the garden and blossoming boughs, Old woman, old woman, old woman?" said I.