"No," says England, "your motives 'Twere cruel to doubt,-- But what if your rev'rence Should put the lamp out?" * * * * * LONDON GOLD DIGGINGS. DEAR Old England! well may one exclaim, on reading in the _Daily News_ a statement such as this:-- "VALUE OF LAND IN LOMBARD STREET.--A piece of land adjoining the Lombard Exchange, in Lombard Street, has been sold for £9000, or about £19 4s. 6d. per foot super." It used to be affirmed that London streets were paved with gold, and, by the side of the above, the story hardly seems beyond one's power of credulity. Land worth nineteen pounds per foot must be wellnigh as good as gold to its fortunate possessor, and the man who owned an acre of it would hardly need to emigrate to any other diggings. Assuredly, to any _Fortunatus_ who owns much land in Lombard Street, London may be looked on as the true Tom Tiddler's Ground. * * * * * =The New Judge.= _Mr. Punch_ hears that LORD CHIEF JUSTICE COCKBURN (one of our most accomplished Latin writers) intimated to the CHANCELLOR that the appointment of the new Judge for the Queen's Bench was a _Sine Quainon_. * * * * * =WANTED--SIMPLICITY.= MR. PUNCH, Is the English language a thing to be ashamed of? I put the question, because in a weekly literary journal, printed and published in London in the mother tongue, I have just read, not without some rubbing of eyes and much mental bewilderment, the following singular announcement:-- "INSTITUTION OF CIVIL ENGINEERS.--The EMPEROR OF BRÉSIL was elected an Honorary Member." I have never heard that Brazil has become a French possession, and I am positive that the Institution of Civil Engineers is not in Paris, but in Great George Street, Westminster. Why, then, Brésil? Crack this Brazil-nut for Yours, unaffectedly, JNO. SMITH. P.S.--Can fish talk? I ask this second question, after seeing that another periodical publication contains an article with the heading, "Perch Prattle." * * * * * =We Can't See It.= OF all the odd kinds of consolation under affliction, the last suggestion seems to _Mr. Punch_ the oddest. We are mourning the demise of the no-horned Infant Hippopotamus in the Regent's Park, and we are told to be cheerful, for a two-horned Infant Rhinoceros has gone to Madrid. The doctrine of compensations was never pushed much further, even in a Scotch sermon. * * * * * =Platonic Politics.= Plato gives the best reason why Woman's Rights should be conceded, and Women be admitted to power. Listen, Dears, "Rulers should have Personal Beauty." Kiss ums own old _Punch_.