"_I_ down on the learned Professor?" retorted my companion, shifting, dislimning, and elongating singularly. "On the contrary, I am grateful to him for being 'down upon' the incompetent architects and careless surveyors who would make of me a pitiful sham. Only" (here another phantasmagorical shift) "when he angrily declares a certain prominent political personage, who shall be nameless, to be also 'a pitiful sham,' why, then I think, like so many other and unscientific 'writers to the papers,' he needs the Conductor of cool Common Sense to divert, carry off, and disperse his too furious fulminations." "Then _you_ are only a Lightning Conductor, after all?" I queried, with some sense of being disappointed, not to say "sold." "_Only!_" retorted my spectral and shifting visitant, again shifting spectrally. "Why, I'm thinking of writing, for the _Nineteenth Century_, an article on 'Political Lightning Conductors,' which, I rather flatter myself, will comprehend everything, convince everybody, and conciliate even Professor TYNDALL. If you like I will read, from the advance-sheets, a few passages which----" But here I roused myself to determined resistance, and--awoke. * * * * * On the Wing. In getting fair hold of the Coburg, Prince FERDINAND, Bulgaria palpably thought she'd a "bird in hand," But the Prince and the Bulgars, when put to the push, Will probably wish the "bird" back in the bush. * * * * * Illustration: "OVERLOOKED!" FIELD-MARSHAL PUNCH (_to H.R.H._). "REALLY, YOUR ROYAL HIGHNESS, IN THE PRESENT STATE OF OUR DEFENCES, _IS_ SIR EDWARD HAMLEY QUITE THE SORT OF MAN TO BE _SHELVED?_" [Sir EDWARD HAMLEY served in the Eastern Campaign of 1854-55, including the affairs of Bulganac and McKenzie's Farm, the Battles of the Alma (horse shot), Balaklava, and Inkerman (horse killed), the Siege and Fall of Sebastopol, and repulse of the Sortie on the 26th October, 1854 (mentioned in Despatches, Medal with four clasps, Brevets of Major and Lt.-Colonel, Knight of the Legion of Honor, Sardinian and Turkish Medals, and 2nd Class of the Medjidie and C.B.). Sir _Edward Hamley_ is the Author of _The Operations of War_, a work that may confidently be characterised as one of the most valuable modern Military books extant--"There exists nothing to compare with it in the English language for enlightened, scientific, and sober teaching in the general art of war"--_vide_ the _Times_ of 1st November, 1869. Served in the Egyptian War of 1882, in command of the 2nd Division, and was present at the Battle of Tel-el-Kebir, where he led the Division (received the thanks of both Houses of Parliament, twice mentioned in Despatches, K.C.B., Medal with clasp, 2nd Class of the Osmanieh, and Khedive's Star).--_Hart's Army List, July_ 1, 1887.] * * * * * MR. PUNCH'S MANUAL FOR YOUNG RECITERS.