Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 98, 1890.05.10Various
General
Punch, or the London Charivari, Vol. 98, 1890.05.10
Various
English wit and humor -- Periodicals
_Thursday._--Ordinarily amicable proceedings in debate on Irish Land
Purchase Bill varied by accidental but unhappy circumstances. Prince
ARTHUR in course of speech happened to say, that "under Bill of 1886
Irish Government was supposed to be a buffer between the English
Government and the Irish tenant." Mr. G., sitting attentive, suddenly
sprang up when this insult fell on his ear. Bill of 1886 not a tempting
topic; led to downfall of his Ministry; but to hear it publicly called a
"buffer," more than he could stand--or, rather, sit. Leaped to feet,
and, with thrilling energy, repudiated gross imputation. Prince ARTHUR
taken aback; hadn't meant anything particular. To call a thing or a
person a buffer not necessarily a term of opprobrium. Everything depends
on inflection of tone. Suppose, now, leaning across the table, he had
addressed Mr. G. as "old buffer," that would perhaps have been a little
familiar, but not vindictive.
This he tried to make clear. Having, as he thought, averted the thunder,
repeated remarks about Bill of 1886 being a buffer. Didn't even put it
in that direct form.
"I said," he observed with seraphic smile and deferential manner, "that
the Irish Government under the Right Hon. Gentleman's Bill was supposed
to occupy the position, more or less, of a buffer between the English
Government and the Irish tenant."
Mr. G. up again with catapultic force and suddenness. "Not in the
least," he angrily protested. "A buffer is between two things."
Expected that would floor Prince ARTHUR; but he came back again, and
sheltering himself behind the brass-bound box, called out, "Yes, but a
buffer might be between two persons as well as between two things."
Mr. G. angrily shook his head; a Jove-like frown mantled his
countenance. But disdained to pursue controversy further, and Prince
ARTHUR, carefully avoiding further reference to buffers, went his way.
Difference of opinion as to how question was left; Conservatives insist
that Prince ARTHUR had best of it; Liberals stand by Mr. G. Many wonder
why SPEAKER did not interfere; as he did not, it is assumed that buffer
is a Parliamentary word, at least when applied to inanimate creation.
_Business done._--Second Heading of Irish Land Purchase Bill carried by
348 Votes against 268.
_Friday._--HARTINGTON suddenly, unexpectedly, surprisingly, blossomed
into effective speech. Of all subjects in world was Disestablishment of
Kirk in Scotland! Calculated to depress most people; brightened
HARTINGTON up beyond all knowledge. His little hit at GLADSTONE,
sheltering himself behind his (HARTINGTON'S) familiar and convenient
declaration, that on Disestablishment Question he would be guided by the
opinion of the majority of the Scotch people, neatly and dexterously
made. Also his reference to the short time when he had honour of being
"at least the nominal Leader of the Liberal Party," and found Mr. G. a
somewhat unruly follower. Most excellent. HARTINGTON should try this
line again.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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